Maybe It's Time to Come Home
by RaitoFlavoredWaffles
Summary: Ludwig is sent to live with his 'insane' brother because his parents don't trust him. His new neighbors might just be crazier. And what's up with that Italian kid next door who wears dresses? Is he the only sane one here? -Gerita!-
1. Chapter 1

**Hey there! This is my first Hetalia fic posted here~ I have a bunch of other planned, but I want to keep this organized. Yeah. Kay. Anyway, I'm starting with this one because I wrote this first part such a long time ago, and I just now figured out what I want to do with it. So, feel free to review (I probably just jinxed myself. Whenever I ask for reviews, I never get them. Hah.) and enjoy!**

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><p>The red Mustang convertible streamed down the road in a casual fashion, but, secretly, one of the passengers inside was having a sort of panic attack.<p>

The 16-year-old German boy's heart was beating fast. His palms were sweating as he toyed absent-mindedly with the hem of his black tank top. His older brother of 23 was at the wheel, driving them to their new home. After an incident at a party of a schoolmate's involving alcohol (which the German didn't indulge in, but was punished nonetheless) and weed (also of which he was not participating in), the boy was sent to live with his brother in a new suburb of a slowly growing town in the country.

The younger brother, Ludwig, was trying to keep from watching the road ahead of them. He had a sort of fear of driving so fast, which also applied to roller-coasters, speed boating, and skiing. His brother swerved around a minivan and punched the gas, causing Ludwig to shut his eyes and clutch his shirt. His ears popped lightly but uncomfortably. He huffed in response and caught the attention of his brother.

"Eh, Ludwig, why are you cringing? I thought you liked the open road and fields of grain and crap," the older mentioned, peeking at the boy to his right and slinging an arm on the edge of the window.

"I do. Just not when you're driving like we're being chased by the police," Ludwig groaned and rubbed at his eyes.

"Would you rather that I open the top?"

"Gilbert, no. That would make it worse."

However, the older boy was already opening the top as the brother spoke. Wind rushed in like a river and washed over them, blowing back their hair and flushing out their hearing.

"Gilbert! I said _don't!_" Ludwig yelled.

"Huh? I can't hear you over the sound of my awesome idea!" Gilbert retorted with a smirk.

Ludwig growled at him as he fervently tried to keep his hair from whipping into his eyes.

Upon arriving at their destination, Ludwig angrily opened his door and stepped out, a scowl on his face like a mask. He ran a hand through his hair and was disgusted to find that it stayed slicked back. Gilbert looked over at him and smiled.

"That's a good look for you, _bruder_! You should slick it back more often!" he laughed and walked to the back of the car to open the trunk. Ludwig reached over the side of the back seat and pulled out a sealed cardboard box of some of his things, hauling it up onto his shoulder. He walked around back to carry his suit case.

He looked around for a moment to check out the neighbors. The house on the right was tall and white with a navy trim. The lawn was mowed and green with a few flowers beside the walkway to the door. No one seemed to be home. The house on the left was tan with a dark trim. There were many, many more flowers than the other house, though they were sprouting randomly throughout the untrimmed yard.

Someone opened the door to that house and stepped outside, walking across the lawn and reaching down to pick some flowers. Ludwig stared. This person had to be _the_ cutest girl he'd ever seen. Her brown-auburn hair was short and cut like a boy's: her bangs parted in the middle and sweeping over her chocolate eyes. A single curl sprouted from the side of her head. It was oddly placed but seemed to fit anyhow. She had lovely and clear olive skin that delved into a light blush on her cheeks just under her cheekbones. The thin pale green dress she wore fluttered lightly at her knees.

Gilbert noticed Ludwig was frozen.

"Ludwig? Did you experience some kind of mental shutdown?" he asked, walking up behind the boy to see from his point of view.

"Huh. You know, I never pegged you as that type," he smirked and slapped Ludwig on the back. The boy jumped and turned to look at him.

"What do you mean 'that type'?"Ludwig questioned, confused.

Dumbfounded, Gilbert blinked.

"Don't play stupid, you know what I mean. By the way, I love you no matter which team you play for," he added nonchalantly.

Ludwig's eyes widened.

"You think I'm _gay? _What the hell, Gilbert?"

Gilbert snorted, "Yeah, well, you _were _just staring blatantly at that kid over there."

He nudged his head in the direction of the house on the left. Ludwig thought for a moment. He watched the pretty girl not-as-blatantly over Gilbert's shoulder. Suddenly the door swung open and an angry man, who looked considerably like the girl (the only differences being his hair was much darker and the oddly placed curl was on the other side of his head), came out.

"Feliciano! What did I tell you about picking the dandelions? You'd better not blow the fluff everywhere again!" he yelled in a thick Italian accent.

The girl looked up, startled.

"B-but I was going to give them to Miss Elizaveta!" the 'girl' called back in an identical accent.

Ludwig nearly dropped the box and the suitcase. That was _not_ girl. He heard Gilbert snickering behind him. He abruptly turned around and scowled, his eyebrow twitching.

"Shut the hell up! It was an honest mistake! I mean, just look at him! Why the fuck is he wearing a dress?" he roared as Gilbert laughed even harder.

"You were so ogling a boy, bruder!" Gilbert howled with an annoying laugh.

"I thought he was a girl!" Ludwig blushed and felt a strange urge to defend himself bubble in the pit of his stomach.

Curious at all the commotion, Feliciano peered over at the house next to his. He noticed someone new and unfamiliar was standing in the driveway of Mr. Gilbert's house, yelling uselessly at the laughing man. Now, Feliciano was a very friendly and charismatic boy, so, naturally, he walked on over to introduce himself to Mr. Gilbert's new friend.

"OH, oh, Ludwig! He's coming over here! We should've picked up flowers for your date!" Gilbert wheezed between fits of giggles.

"Shut UP!" Ludwig growled and was ready to pounce on his older sibling. Just before he lunged for the silver-haired man, he heard the other boy approaching.

"Hey! Hey! You're new here!" he waved and made his way across the lawn to Gilbert's driveway. Ludwig stopped immediately and stood straight, trying to look calm and dignified. Gilbert seemed as if he couldn't care less.

"Ve~! You must be a friend of Mr. Gilbert!" the Italian boy said dreamily. Ludwig could already notice a pattern in his speech. This kid liked to drag out the ends of his sentences like an excited child. _How cute._

Gilbert snorted, "Y-yeah. This is my baby brother, Ludwig. Ludwig, this is Feliciano. Sh- *cough* HE lives next door."

"I am not your _baby _brother," Ludwig said simply.

Feliciano looked like he was day dreaming as he held out a small hand.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Ludwig! Heyyy, you're really tall! Like a tree!"

"Uh…thanks?" Ludwig took his hand gingerly; feeling like it might brake if he held too hard. He shook it as Feliciano stared strangely at him.

"You talk really funny!" Feliciano giggled and subtly squeezed Ludwig's hand. The German withdrew his arm and held it behind his back.

"I could say the same about you, y'know," he replied, confused at this boy's ability to change subjects so quickly.

"Ohhh! Yeah! I'm not from America! I'm from Italy!" the Italian said happily and clapped his hands together. "Where are you from, ve?"

"G-Germany. I moved here ten years ago, and now I have to live with my insane brother," he scratched the back of his neck even though it didn't really itch.

"Wow! You're just like me! Can we be friends?" the boy asked and looked up at the German with such an expression that made him blush.

"Y-yeah, I suppose so,"

"Ve~!" the Italian boy sighed and hugged the German suddenly, causing him to blush even more. He looked over at his dumbfounded brother who stared wide-eyed at the pair.

"We're going to be best friends forever!" he mumbled into Ludwig's chest.

Dear lord, what a _fun _time he was going to have here...

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><p><strong>My sister drives like Gilbert. It's rather terrifying. ...now that I think of it, me and her are a lot like Ludwig and Gilbert. I, of course, get to be Ludwig. Ha.<strong>


	2. Chapter 2

Later, after prying the small boy off of him and rushing inside with his bags, Ludwig slumped against the wall of his new bedroom. It was plain and small, but only because of the large bed placed in the middle. He got up and pushed the bed up against the far wall for some room. At times like these, Ludwig was really glad he worked out.

He sat on the neatly made, blue-sheeted bed and stared at the floor. The events of that morning were still racking his brain unpleasantly. He shook his head and closed his eyes, wondering, _why didn't I see it was a boy? Even Gilbert knew!_

A knock at his door made him grunt. It cracked open, revealing one strange, red eye staring back at him. The white barrier swung open and here came Gilbert; slinging the rest of Ludwig's boxes of belongings on the floor.

"What's up?" he said casually and looked at his brother nonchalantly.

Ludwig looked up, a cross between angry and pitiful sweeping over his face. Gilbert furrowed his eyebrows.

"Something the matter?" he sat next to Ludwig and slung an arm around the other's shoulders, who looked back strangely and shrugged it off.

"Nothing's wrong," the younger replied and looked the other way.

"Something's bothering you. Is it that Italian kid?"

Ludwig turned his attention to his bare feet resting on the hardwood floor. He curled his toes and shook his head.

"Oh, what, are you going through some kind of identity crisis? Trying to 'find yourself' or 'figure out who you are' or some shit?"

Though it was barely noticeable, he saw his brother cringe at his words.

"Hey, look, no hard feelings, okay? That guy has been strange ever since I met him. The hot girl next door always puts him in dresses. And then he comes running up to me, showing off his frilly little dress. Yeah, okay, he's pretty in a dress, but he's…he's damn weird. He lives with his bat-shit insane brother and his brother's fiancé, who's some Spanish guy named Antonio. Who isn't all that weird when I think about it. But still. Strange bunch, those Italians…"

Ludwig slept in late the next morning. Which was fine, considering it was the middle of summer break. But Gilbert had tried to cook breakfast by himself, which wasn't fine, because the fumes of burnt eggs and toast woke him rather unpleasantly. He stumbled out of bed and tripped over a still sealed cardboard box. He kicked the box rather harshly and almost ran into the door. Apparently he'd have to get used to his new room.

He padded down the hall clad in blue boxers and a black tank top, noting that the house still smelled like wood and fresh paint. The kitchen was down the stairs and to the left, through an arched walkway. Ludwig entered the large kitchen and nearly choked; the smell was so strong that he wondered briefly if he would pass out. On the island counter was a plate of charred food covered with saran wrap. A magic marker smiley face was lazily drawn onto the wrap. A torn off piece of paper was slipped under the plate.

Ludwig placed a hand over his mouth as he neared the plate, picking up the paper between his thumb and forefinger. It was a note from Gilbert.

_I made you breakfast! It's a little dark, I know, but that's just the color it turns because of my radiating awesomeness. Oh, and go mow the lawn. I'm too busy to do it. And I don't want to._

_Love,_

_Gilbo, your AWESOME older bro_

_P.S.-you might just want to throw that food away…the animals might die if you toss it outside._

He blinked at the obnoxious red ink it was written in and then crumpled it. He tossed it in the trash bin along with the plate of what was supposed to be food. Ludwig decided to skip breakfast altogether since he had chores to do and, quite frankly, that failed attempt at cooking was pretty disgusting.

The garage door to the Beilschmidts' home opened, revealing a tall, blond boy leaning on a lawn mower. He pushed it down the driveway and paused to yawn, then yanked on the pull chord to rev it up. The engine howled and grumbled, making the grip shake and vibrate. Ludwig took hold of the bar and pushed, being careful about not running over rocks or small furry creatures.

When he was done, he turned off the old, heavy machine and sat in the middle of the yard. And that's when he saw it.

In parts of the lawn, tall stems stuck up at odd angles. The ends were cut sharp and jagged, like you could cut yourself on one. Ludwig started to panic. Gilbert was the one who had planted the flowers. Only Ludwig knew of his brother's love for gardening, just as Gilbert was the only one who knew that Ludwig loved to bake cakes.

…which he intended to keep a secret. Forever.

So there Ludwig sat, looking scared and sad in the middle of his freshly mown lawn, staring at the innocent flowers he had just murdered. _He _was going to be murdered once Gilbert returned.

Feliciano was sitting on the steps to his house, his knees drawn up and his head resting in his hands. He had been shooed outside by his brother when Antonio had come home from work. That wasn't really all that surprising, really. But Feliciano was sad because whenever it happened, Lovino would lock the door and forget to call him back inside. Then Feliciano would have to sleep outside in the grass or pry his way into the garage if it was raining. And if he did get into the garage, and the door inside happened to be unlocked, he would get the snot beaten out of him because one of the occupants already inside would mistake him for a burglar.

He sighed and turned his attention to the blond next door. He had apparently finished mowing, and was seated in his yard, looking rather melancholy. Feliciano noticed that all of the pretty flowers Mr. Gilbert planted weren't there anymore. Ludwig must've chopped them all down!

Feliciano sprang up from the steps, ran all over his yard and picked the prettiest flowers he saw, and dashed over to the Beilschmidt household.

Ludwig mentally cursed as he saw a familiar boy running to him with a wide smile. He was panting by the time he reached the German. Ludwig tilted his head and peered up at the Italian.

"You're wearing pants today." he said, squinting from the sunlight. Feliciano nodded and blushed.

"Ve…well, you see…" he paused and unknowingly stared at the blue-eyed boy beneath him. He snapped out of his trance once Ludwig coughed awkwardly.

"These are for you." he smiled and showed him the flowers. "You chopped down the other ones, as you can have these!"

"Uh…thanks…" he reached up to take the crude bouquet, but a loud yell from next door made him jump.

"Feliiii~!" a feminine voice called from the white house. A girl came strutting over with a smile on her face and a bundle of cloth in her left hand. Her hair was long, wavy, and had a dirty blond hue. Her green eyes sparkled when she saw what was going on.

"Ah, Feli, who's this?" she tilted her head and eyed him up. "And why the hell is he in _Gilbert's _yard."

Feli smiled and hugged her quickly, and then turned to Ludwig.

"This is Ludwig~! He's Mr. Gilbert's little brother! He's my best friend in the whole world!" Feliciano swayed on his feet, starting to giggle. Ludwig pulled a strange face, looking between the girl (whose accent he was still trying to place) and the dazed Italian.

"I'm Elizaveta. I live next door, obviously. You'd better not be a dick like your troll of a brother." She glared and placed her hands on her hips.

Ludwig blinked. "Ah…no, I'm not anything like Gilbert…"

"Yeah! Ludwig's nice and tall and pretty!"

Ludwig's eye twitched.

"Speaking of pretty, I came over here to give you this new dress I sewed!" she took the clothing from around her arm and shook it loose, revealing a rather playful looking purple dress.

"Oh, ehm…ve…I'm not allowed to wear dresses anymore…" Feli looked at the ground and kicked at the grass. "Fratello said so."

"I should kick his ass. He doesn't know how to have any fun. Oh well, I'll make Roderich wear it, I suppose…" she huffed and folded the dress back up.

"Ve~! Maybe Ludwig will wear it!" Feliciano suggested out of the blue, making Ludwig blush hard and shake his head quickly.

"Oh, no, hun. Ludwig's chest is too broad. I'd have to resize it and everything." she shook her head as well, smiling reassuringly at Ludwig. "…you sure did pick a handsome one, though, Feli!"

"Yeah…" Feliciano murmured and blushed. He looked away and smiled while swinging his arms behind his back.

Ludwig gulped, feeling panic rise in his chest (which was too broad, apparently). He stood abruptly and cleared his throat, rubbing the back of his head.

"I, uh, have to go put this away. And then I have to clean. Inside. Furiously. For a long time. So, I'll see you later, Feliciano. Nice meeting you, miss." The blond flashed a rare smile at Feliciano and hurried inside. Then he rushed back outside, claiming he forgot the mower, pulled it into the garage, and hurried back inside. Again.

Elizaveta giggled and turned to Feli, who had a hint of disappointment in his eyes.

"Don't worry. He'll come around eventually. Give him some time."

"Okay…"

The girl patted his head and turned on her heal, heading back to her house. Feli looked up at the sky and felt a familiar sense of fear spreading through him. It was almost nighttime. That meant it would get very, very dark. He'd have to sleep out in the cold, dark yard all night with no blankets or Ludwig to keep him safe. He frowned and sat on the curb, knees drawn up and his head in his hands again.

A car pulled up in the driveway. Feliciano looked over and saw that it was Gilbert returning home. The silver haired man slammed the car door shut, leaned against it, and looked carefully at the yard. His eyes widened suddenly, and he ran inside the front door, yelling, "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY FLOWERS, LUDWIG?"

He could hear Ludwig's faint reply of, "Yeah? Well what the hell happened to my breakfast?" The rest was shouted in German, followed by a crash of some sort, more obscenities, and loud laughing from Gilbert. It was silent for a while, and then he saw Gilbert push Ludwig out the front door and hand him a bunch of little packets. He threw a bag of soil at him, and told him to replant the yard.

Ludwig said something akin to, "Fuck you, bastard."

Gilbert ruffled the blond locks, kissed his brother's cheek, and closed the door.

He watched him trudge down the porch steps, scowl on his face and all.

Feliciano smiled and wondered what he would give to have a nice brother like that.

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><p><strong>Right. Gilbert's a 'nice' brother. *cough* Oh well. I suppose Lovino's just as swell. Anyway, I just now wrote this part, and I got too excited to wait until later to post it. So here you go!<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm sorry this took so long to update. I was busy this week; my great grandmother passed away so I had to go to her funeral and whatnot. Plus, my insomnia decided it would be fun to kick in again. Boo.**

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><p>Ludwig dropped the pile of packets and soil onto the grass, then crossed his arms and stared at it. He looked angry as he glared at the poor intimidated pile of supplies. His lips pursed for a moment, then his eyebrow twitched, and he gave out with a frustrated sigh. He looked around at the yard before directing his gaze at the darkening sky. The sun was drifting behind the lush green trees, casting a long shadow down the cul-de-sac. He disappeared for a moment into the garage to get a trowel and a watering can, and then walked back to the grass. He knelt down with the trowel in hand, ready to…ah, hell; he didn't know the first thing about gardening!<p>

The German stared at the trowel with one eyebrow twitching and a lopsided frown on his face. Was he just supposed to dig up the yard? Gilbert wouldn't like that very much… And was he supposed to use the whole packet in one hole? But then the flowers would grow in individual bunches across the lawn, and that definitely didn't seem natural.

Feliciano noticed Ludwig's hard staring directed at the ground. It looked like he had a lot of work to do, and Mr. Gilbert wasn't very lenient when it came to planting anything. He stood and brushed off his jeans, then headed over to the thoroughly confused German.

Ludwig noticed the sky was getting darker. Verdammt, how was he going to get this done before nightfall? …oh, great. Feliciano was walking towards him…

"Ciao, Ludwig! You look like you're in pain~!" Feliciano sang from the driveway. He skipped over to Ludwig and jumped right in front of him. "Do you need some help?"

_No, I do not need help! _He thought angrily. _Especially not from you…_

"Yes, actually. I have no idea what I'm doing." 

Damn. 

"Okay! Er…what _are _you doing?"

"Gilbert's making me replant the flowers. I don't know anything about plants, so I have no idea how to go about this." He mumbled. Feliciano smiled.

"I've seen Mr. Gilbert plant things before! He plants the flowers in our yard every spring! He does it kinda weird, too. I'll show you how!"

"Ah, okay."

Feliciano took the trowel from Ludwig's hand, a few packets from the ground, and ventured over to the very left corner of the yard. He knelt down and motioned for the blond to do the same. Ludwig sat cross-legged beside him.

"The way Mr. Gilbert does it is strange. You don't need the soil over there. I'm not sure why he gave you any. Anyway, he digs out a little hole like this," Feli took the tip of the instrument and dug downward, then up; cutting out a nice chunk of earth. "And then he puts the seeds in. Hand me a packet."

Ludwig reached behind himself and grabbed a packet of petunia seeds, handing it to the waiting Italian. Feliciano thanked him and ripped the top of the pack off, then sprinkled a few seeds into the hole.

"Then he puts the top of the grass back on. That's why you need to be careful not to hack it out when you dig. Oh, and then you water it. And that's all."

"That's it? Really?"

"Yep!" he chimed and smiled. Ludwig shook his head.

"Ah…I have to get this all done before tomorrow…and there's a lot of packets here, so…can you, um, help me? …possibly?"

"Sure! Anything for you, ve~!" the Italian hugged him quickly and Ludwig flushed lightly, pushing the boy off of him.

The two got to work digging many identical holes in Ludwig's lawn and planting flowers. They lined the driveway with colorful petunias and snapdragons by the porch. Lilacs were put by the mailbox in bundles. Carnations were planted along the edges of the yard in all different colors. The two could tell it would look beautiful once they all grew. 

For now, it was just a regular lawn. 

"...Ludwig, I'm so tired..." Feliciano murmured and fell back onto the soft grass.

"Don't lay there. You'll get chigger bites."

"...Ve, I don't even know what that is..."

Feliciano was spread out on the grass, his arms and legs splayed. His hair was matted yet strangely well kept while a flush painted his cheeks a deep pink.

Ludwig looked at the boy next to him with an expression that one might explain as a look of concern. He shrugged off his jacket and told the Italian to sit up.

"At least lay on this."

Feli took the jacket and spread it beneath him to lie on top. He curled on his side and smiled at the German.

"Thanks. It's less pokey this way." his eyes then slipped shut and his sense of surrounding failed him. He drifted off into a light, sweet slumber.

Ludwig looked up at the inky sky. The stars were dull and plain to him. The moon hung half-dressed and depressed by a large, bushy tree to the right. He closed his eyes for a moment and listened to the crickets and the locusts. They croaked and chirped at him to rest like his companion. He took their advice and laid backward, his neck prickled by the cut grass. His arms itched with the nips of tiny insects and stray points of sharp lawn.

The figure next to him roused and shifted, pulling him onto half of his own jacket. The boy curled into his side and rested his head on the German's shoulder.

"Don't lay on the grass like that. You'll get trigger bites." Feli whispered playfully.

"Chigger, not trigger."

"Ve~ I think I'm too tired to care..."

The German barely had time to make an insulting comeback before Feliciano was out cold. He snored lightly against Ludwig's collar, making a strange and uncomfortable vibration in his ear. He didn't shift away, however. The Italian was very warm and cuddly and _dear God, what was he thinking._

He sighed and placed a hand behind his head. The nocturnal creatures were lulling him to sleep. Their noises and calls combined made a pleasant humming invade his hearing, while the smell of chlorophyll surrounded him. The fireflies served as soft reminders that the world is not completely dark. He soon felt like he was teetering on the edge of awareness and unconsciousness, and he let himself fall into the pit between his reality and his fears.


	4. Chapter 4

**I know it's 3 am but I already had like half of this chapter written and my Germany and Italy sims have had like 6 kids together and THEY ALL LOOK LIKE LUDWIG. OMG. So it's a little BOOORRINNGG around here (you get a cookie if you know where that's from. YOU SHOULD KNOW WHERE IT'S FROM). And I don't usually sleep until 4 am anyway. So here you go~ **

**Oh, and thanks for the reviews, guys! Gotta love them reviews! ;D**

**There's bunch of cussing in this one, courtesy of Gilbert and Lovino. And masturbation. But not really. It's fake masturbation. Hooray for not really getting off!**

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><p>The world was dark and damp and warm. Like a forgotten cave deep within the earth, slick with pure water dripping from stalactites. Slowly, the earth cooled and the cave turned bright. The tweaking of twigs snapping and birds calling to their families echoed in his ears. His entire body was sticky with lukewarm sweat, his head pounding for unknown reasons.<p>

The world welcomed Ludwig back from the realm of slumber once again. And, like always, he was wishing he could've had a longer stay.

It took him a bit to realize exactly where he was. He was itchy and sweaty and his bones ached. His arm was asleep and he could already tell his hair was a mess.

Oh, right. He fell asleep on his jacket in the front yard with Feliciano...

...who wasn't there anymore.

Ludwig's jacket was wrapped tight around himself, like someone tucked him into bed. The German sat up and yawned harshly. Dawn was still breaking and melting the ice of nighttime. The birds were still half asleep with lazy caws. And Gilbert's car was still in the drive.

Speaking of Gilbert, the older brother stumbled out the front door looking like a drunken sheep. He wasn't drunk, however. He managed to stay sober on work days, as far as Ludwig knew. Gilbert yawned and scratched his back, walking towards the mailbox. He froze when he noticed someone sleeping on his lawn. His brain went into German-Ninja-Pirate mode for a second, and his whole body tensed as his eyes narrowed. He crouched down defensively and scanned the area. He then realized the wiggling gray thing in his yard was his little brother wrapped up in a jacket. He calmed himself and snickered as the younger sat up.

"What the hell. You slept in the yard? What's wrong with you?"

"I was...doing the-um, planting and stuff, and then it was really late and I just...fell asleep. I guess."

"Well get your lazy ass off my lawn. You've already left a full body imprint in the grass. I betcha some cop's gonna show up and ask who I killed this time."

Ludwig stood, his head buzzing and aching, and stretched weakly. Gilbert was already heading back to the mailbox, reaching inside and pulling out several envelopes.

"C'mon, Lud. Go inside. You need to go sleep in a bed, not on the ground. ...and I'm afraid if I leave you out here that you might pass out on the driveway, and I'd run you over on my way to work. That wouldn't be very awesome. For you, anyway."

"Gee, it's nice to know you care."

"Yeah, yeah. Don't get _too_used to it."

Streams of piping hot water jetted from the shower head and thumped against the bottom of the bath. The mirrors were already beginning to fog up as Ludwig stepped inside. He hissed lightly at the heat, hoping he would adjust to its temperature soon. He hated fiddling with the dials; they were very touchy and moving it just slightly could be the difference between being boiled alive and frozen to death.

He stood there for a moment, watching the water slither towards the drain. He was truly, very tired. Sleeping out in the cold, damp yard was a horrible idea. He still had a raging headache, but the steam somewhat loosened the compacted pain.

He reached for the half-empty bottle of shampoo, which the label had been torn off of (Gilbert had a tick where he felt that he _had _to tear off soggy labels) and snapped open the cap. A scent of wood and mint hit his senses, and he breathed in deeply.

Leave it to Gilbert to buy a "manly" shampoo that smells like you've been trekking in the forest with warm Tic-Tacs in your back pocket for days. Ludwig thought it was better to have a perfume-ish scent to yourself than that of a lumberjack.

The German rubbed the blue-colored liquid into his scalp anyhow, raking his fingers through his fair locks and back behind his ears. He stood under the stream of water, letting it wash over his head and burn the tips of his shoulders. His bangs slipped down and covered his closed eyes. When it didn't feel slippery anymore, Ludwig combed his hair back with his fingers and coaxed it to stay there. He opened the shower curtain for a moment and peeked out at the mirror. Remembering what Gilbert had said, he decided that slicking his hair back was actually a nice look for him. He smiled for a moment, then shook his hair loose and cringed at the stabbing pain behind his eyes. _Someone might call me a greaser if I comb it back like that in public…_

The cool air outside made him shiver, so he closed the curtain again and sat on the shower floor. He curled his legs up into his chest and sat his chin on his kneecaps. He peered at the small shelf that held the body wash and shampoo and whatnot; figuring that they'd have to go shopping soon and buy more pleasantly scented products. Ludwig closed his eyes and sighed, enjoying the feeling of the hot water pulsing on his back. He felt his head grow fuzzy with exhaustion after a moment, and decided it was best to finish up before he fell asleep.

The curtain was peeled back and stuck itself to the side of the bath. Ludwig stepped out and grabbed a folded towel off the top of the hamper and rubbed his hair with it. He took another off the floor and quickly dried his torso, then wrapped it around his midsection.

He wiped in a clear section of the mirror to examine himself. His golden hair hung heavy with water, over his eyebrows and touched his eyelids. He had shocking blue eyes that seemed a bit on the dull side today. His cheekbones looked a tad bit higher and sharper than he remembered. His collar was sharp as well, and delved into broad shoulders and muscular arms. And yes, he decided, his chest was also pretty broad.

And with that, he opened the bathroom door and padded up the stairs into his room. He swung open the door and collapsed on his bed instantly. Face down on the covers and his tip toes still touching the ground, he groaned into his bedspread. He turned his head so he wouldn't suffocate and peeked at the door. He left it open and was debating whether or not to get up and close it. Half of him couldn't care less and the other half was paranoid that someone would walk in and discover what an…_odd _position he was in. He let his paranoia get the best of him and he shoved off the bed to close the door. As soon as it clicked shut, the phone rang.

Ludwig tensed for a moment and figured it was just his luck to finally get to the part where he actually _slept _and have to be interrupted. He thought about letting it go to the recording machine, but then dismissed it on account of it possibly being Gilbert calling about something important. Not that Gilbert ever called about anything, but it was still a possibility.

He reached for the phone and pressed the green talk button, then held it to his ear and mumbled a greeting.

"Ciao! It's Feliciano!"

Ludwig sat on his bed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. This was definitely going to make his headache worse.

"Hey. Do you need something?"

"N-not really…I just wanted to say I'm sorry for leaving last night. Fratello got mad at Antonio and kicked him out for the night, and then he saw me in your yard, and he was all, 'Feli! What are you doing in the beer bastard's lawn?' and I told him I was sleeping with you, and he said, 'fuck, beer bastard has a brother? Why the hell are you sleeping with him in their yard? Come home right now!' So I had to leave. …Ve."

Ludwig wasn't quite sure how to respond. He was silent for probably longer than he thought.

Feliciano didn't say anything for a while either.

"I'm sorry!" he whispered. His tone was rather unsettling.

"Uh…it's alright, Feliciano. I wasn't really that concerned…But, um…I'm pretty tired, and I've got a bad headache, so do you think we could talk later? I really just want to sleep…" he was trying his best not to hurt the Italian's feelings.

"Oh. Oh, yeah, that's fine! Maybe I'll stop by and give you some special pasta to make you feel better!"

"…y-yeah, that'd be…that'd be great. Thanks."

"I'll see you later, then! Sweet dreams!"

"Yeah, see you later…"

He hung up before their awkward conversation could continue. He sat for a moment, head in his hands, and wondered why it was _so hard _to talk normally to him. Ludwig suddenly felt nervous around Feliciano, and he always thought he was going to say something stupid or offensive to him. It wasn't like he didn't have any social skills. If anything, Feliciano should be the one who would be worried about screwing something up…

Ah, hell. He was too tired for this.

Ludwig set the phone down on his nightstand and laid back on the bed. _Finally, _time for some decent sleep…

It was nearly dusk when he woke again. Gilbert was clanging around in the kitchen, singing along to some metal song playing on the radio. Ludwig rubbed at his dry eyes and was relieved to find that his headache was gone. His towel had fallen off in his sleep, however, and he was now resting on his back, naked, on top of the covers on his bed. He blushed suddenly and thanked himself for closing his door earlier.

He pulled on a pair of knee length shorts and a black tank top and then ventured into the bathroom.

He wasn't sure why Gilbert had hair gel. Gilbert never needed hair gel, or even hair spray, but he kept a jar of it in the very back of the medicine cabinet nonetheless. Ludwig dipped his fingers in the gooey mess and ran it through his hair, slicking it back. He caught a few stray strands and put them in place with a few more dabs of gel. He left the bathroom and went to join Gilbert in the kitchen.

His face contorted into a look of disgust as he gradually neared the kitchen where his brother was singing quite terribly. He entered the room and took a seat quietly at a stool by the island counter. Gilbert noticed someone was in the room and turned, then smiled.

"Lookin' slick, Grease!" he teased and turned back to whatever he was cooking on the stove. Ludwig scowled.

"Damn it, I knew someone would say something like that…" he mumbled and hung his head.

"Awh, c'mon. I was just kidding. It looks really nice! Almost awesome, even. _Almost._ Not quite _my _level of awesome, though."

"What are you making?"

"Oh, that kid next door stopped by and wanted to make you some spaghetti or something. I took his noodles and told him to get lost 'cause you were busy."

"Gilbert! Why would you do that? What would I have been busy with? I told him I was sleeping!"

"Oh, you know. Spanking the monkey. And…other Ludwig stuff."

Ludwig stared in disbelief.

"…What the hell is wrong with you? You told him to leave because I was busy _masturbating?_"

"I took his pasta first. _Then _I told him to leave because you were busy masturbating. Pretty good excuse, right?" he smiled and stirred the water in the pot in front of him. "So now we're having pasta for dinner!"

"You're an ass, Gilbert." Ludwig gritted and left the room to go clear things up. He heard Gilbert calling for him to come back, but he didn't listen. He walked out the front door, down the steps, and through the yard. He came to Feliciano's door rather quickly and had a mini anxiety attack before ringing the doorbell. He waited for a while, silently wondering if anyone was home. The door opened abruptly, and who answered wasn't Feliciano.

He was a little on the tall side, with dark brown hair and shining emerald eyes. He had a smile on his face like everything was just _wonderful. _He had on a pale yellow V-neck tee shirt, rather loose fitting skinny jeans, and a pair of worn boots over them.

"Oh, hey! It's been like, forever since we've had any visitors! Lovi~! Someone's at the door!" he called and smiled even wider. Ludwig stood there, silent, and a little confused. Was this guy Antonio…?

The Spaniard was suddenly pushed aside, though, as a familiar face entered the doorway. From what Ludwig had gathered, this was Feliciano's brother.

"Who are you and what the fuck do you want?" he drawled, a permanent frown on his face.

"Oh…uh…I just need to talk to Feliciano. I live next door." He jabbed a thumb in the direction of his house and got a rather unpleasant response.

"_You're _beer bastard's brother? Tch, I should've known! There's no way I'm letting you see my dumbass brother! Get lost, you macho potato!" the angry Italian in front of him yelled.

"Lovi~, don't be mean! Feli's been sad all day, and all he ever talks about is Gilbert's bro! Let them talk."

Lovino stood there, practically snarling at Ludwig, before shouting, "FINE!"

He slammed the door shut in Ludwig's face. The German stood there again, silent and confused. Should he just walk away, or…?

But the door opened again before he could finish his thought. Feliciano stepped out of the doorway and onto the first step, closing the door behind him. He smiled at Ludwig.

"Ve, I'm glad you came by." He mentioned softly. The brunet held his hands behind his back and swayed. Ludwig blinked.

"Eh…yeah. I'm sorry about my brother…he didn't know you were stopping by…" the German said just as quietly.

"…huh? I-"

"And I wasn't jerking off, I swear!" Ludwig added, louder than he intended.

Feliciano cocked his head slightly and furrowed his brow. "Wait, what?"

"…Gilbert didn't tell you I was 'spanking the monkey', did he?"

"…No…no, he said you were sleeping…ve…so I gave him the box and asked him to make you the pasta whenever you woke up…"

"…Oh, Jesus…" Ludwig muttered and mentally beat himself up.

"…did I do something wrong?" Feliciano asked and took a step forward.

"What? No, but now I have to violently murder Gilbert…" Ludwig turned away and started walking back to his own abode, but was stopped by Feliciano grabbing his wrist.

"Are you going to eat my pasta first?" he asked, his expression as serious as ever.

"…yeah."

The grip was released and the Italian smiled. "Okay. Try not to make a mess, ve."

Ludwig nodded awkwardly and started back for his house. Feli opened the door and Antonio peeked out, shouting, "Bye bye, man!" at Ludwig. The German paused to wave slightly and shake his head.

Oh yes. Gilbert was going to _pay._

* * *

><p><strong>We get to see a lot of the Beilschmidt household and not so much the Vargas household…so I was wondering, should I write a few chapters focusing on Feliciano's daily life? I think it'd be a nice breath of fresh air…<strong>

**And as a side note, Lovino doesn't really have any specific insulting names for Gilbert, so I just made one up so both him and Ludwig wouldn't be potato bastard. xD**


	5. Chapter 5

**I'm sorry it took so long to update! Busy, busy week. I made this chapter extra long to make up for it! Thanks, guys!**

* * *

><p>"Antonio!"<p>

"Yes, Lovi?"

"Shut the door. The air is on."

Antonio frowned briefly and turned, helping Feliciano inside and closing the door. Feli looked dazed and off in his own world as if talking to Ludwig had cheered him completely up.

Antonio went to sit by Lovino on the couch while Feliciano stood, silent and dreaming in the foyer.  
>A sudden chime from the TV shook him from his blank thoughts. Feli looked over at the couch where his brother and Antonio were seated. The Spaniard had an arm around Lovino's shoulders, holding him tight as they semi-cuddled while watching a Lifetime movie. Feli looked to the floor and back at the couple before moping down the stairs to his room.<p>

Feliciano's room was surprisingly clean. A neatly made loft bed stood in the corner, where a desk was nestled underneath. He had a walk-in closet with an entire rack dedicated to Elizaveta's pretty dresses. There were posters of various bands strewn on the wall along with an Italian flag pinned to the ceiling.

Feliciano walked over to his desk and plucked a used sketchbook off its surface, then climbed the ladder of his bed and wriggled onto the mattress. He laid on his belly and placed the book on the pillow, flipping to a blank page in the back. He had had an urge to draw something since that morning, but hadn't found the motivation to do so. But now that the day was almost done, he had time to clear his thoughts.

He unhooked the mechanical pencil from the book's binding. He then pressed the tip of the lead against the soft paper and paused, realizing he didn't really have an idea of what he had wanted to draw.

Feliciano had always had a gift for art. Ever since he could remember, he had been painting and drawing pictures. His grandfather was the one who encouraged him to keep improving in his work. And when his grandfather died, Feliciano promised himself he wouldn't let go of his talent.

So here he was, artistically inclined and nothing to put down on paper. He thought about doing the same thing as he always did: draw the first thing that came to his mind. Feliciano closed his eyes and thought, finding that the very first thing he thought of was pasta. But since most of this particular sketchbook was full of pictures of pasta, he went with the second-first thing that came to his mind.

…Which was Ludwig.

The Italian felt a warmth creep up on his cheeks and decided he didn't really feel like drawing anymore. He shoved the sketchbook under his pillow and sighed, realizing he didn't really feel like doing anything anymore. He closed his eyes and tried to sleep, hoping the aching feeling in his chest would go away by morning.

_**The next day, at the Beilschmidt household…**_

Ludwig paced the hallway outside of his older brother's room, nervous about starting his revenge. He snickered softly to himself in anticipation, checked his watch, and opened the door.

Gilbert's head was at the edge of the bed, where his feet should've been, and one arm tucked under his face with the other hanging off the side. His legs were spread at an alarming distance, nearly hanging off the sides of the large bed. Ludwig took a moment to try and figure out how anyone could sleep like that and then decided that wasn't of his concern at the time. He shook his head and contemplated the worst way to wake up a person who slept like they were dead.

The younger boy silently walked to the foot of the bed and leaned, getting as close to his brother's ear as his personal space would allow. …_When did Gil get his ear pierced?_

"Gilbert…" he whispered sweetly and watched as the other's nose twitched.

He took a deep breath to calm himself and another for…

"**GILBERT! GET UP RIGHT NOW!"**

Gilbert yelped and jumped, nearly knocking his head into Ludwig's. The younger expertly held himself from laughing or even cracking a smile.

"You're going to be late for work. It's already 7:40." he said, stepping back from the bed.

"…what?" Gilbert groaned; his voice hoarse from hours of being silenced.

"If you don't leave the house right now, you will be late for work. It's 7:40 a.m. on Friday morning and you usually leave at 7:15."

"Why didn't you wake me up sooner, asshole?" Gilbert rolled out of bed (literally; Ludwig had to step into the doorway so he wouldn't be squashed by his brother) and dashed for the bathroom. Once inside, he paused, forgetting why he was in there, and left the room. He went back into his bedroom and rushed to get dressed. He then fumbled down the hall while trying to button his shirt and figure out where Ludwig went. Gilbert flew down the stairs and slid to the kitchen, where his brother was stirring something in a big pot on the stove. It smelled delicious, whatever it was. He told Ludwig goodbye and slammed the front door, practically running (in)to his car.

He drove like a madman, even more so than usual. He had no time to pretend to drag race cops and honk obnoxiously behind old ladies, so Gilbert practically flew through green lights and maybe even a stop sign here and there. He pulled into the parking lot behind the restaurant where he worked and stepped out to admire his rather wonderful parking job. But, being his oblivious self, he hadn't noticed that the lot was quite empty for a Friday…

The 'personnel only' door was locked, surprisingly; so Gilbert had to go around front and pry the door open. He got inside and paused. The large, fancy, possibly over-decorated dining room was dimly lit as usual, but it lacked the presence of stuck-up business men and lousy food critics. Gilbert narrowed his eyes and continued down the set up of neatly made tables. He made it to the kitchen door, where he cupped his hands around his eyes and peered through the window at the dark room. This door was locked as well. He turned, confused and pretty pissed off, and nearly screamed when he finally saw that there was someone following him.

"Bonjour, Monsieur Gilbert! 'Ave you come in to make up for all that time you spent slacking off?"

Francis stood, hands on his hips and watching Gilbert carefully. He was the owner of the restaurant and he always came in to work in the kitchen even though he didn't need to. Today, his lengthy blond hair was pulled back into a (manly) ponytail and a short rose was tucked into the breast pocket of his apron.

"…w-what?"Gilbert backed up against the wall as his eye twitched.

"It is Sunday. If you aren't 'ere to work then I 'ave to assume you are going to steal something." The French man stepped closer, crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes.

"…Sunday? What do you mean, _Sunday? _I thought it was Friday! …What the hell happened to Saturday?"

"Looks someone got drunk off 'is derrière on Saturday and forgot what day it is~!"

"Shut up! I'm going back home. Don't tell anyone I came in today, Frenchie."

"Oh ho ho! …alright. But you 'ave to promise not to sleep under the unoccupied tables anymore!"

"What about the occupied ones?"

"Now that's just sick."

"Fine!" Gilbert pushed off of the wall and brushed past Francis, speed walking to the door like it was normal. He turned and sighed.

"Thanks."

Francis just waved as the silver-haired man left, and watched out the window as he drove away like a runaway criminal.

"Ludwig, you little weasel offspring!" Gilbert shouted in the general direction of the kitchen as he stormed in the door. He kicked off his shoes and slid to the kitchen where his brother was still cooking something.

"What kind of insult is that?" Ludwig asked nonchalantly. "Why are you home so early?"

"You know why, bastard. You lied to me and told me it was Friday!" Gilbert took a seat at the island counter.

"I also said it was 7 a.m. It's actually right about noon." Ludwig turned away from the pot to face his brother with a dull smirk.

"Well, fuck." The older one raked a hand through his short hair.

"Anyway, I knew you'd be mad at me for pulling a little prank, so I made you some lunch."

"If it's spaghetti again I'm going to strangle you."

"Does it smell like spaghetti?"

"No."

"Then it's not spaghetti, so suck it up and eat your wurst." He placed a plate in front of Gilbert and sat on the other side of the counter.

"Damn it, we always have wurst! Learn how to cook something else!" Gilbert whined as he jabbed at the meat with his fork. It was rather soft and mushy…

"Maybe you should learn to quit being a lazy jerk and make something for yourself if you don't like my cooking!" Ludwig didn't have a plate for himself; he wasn't even eating the wurst. Instead, he was chewing on the corner of a poptart.

Gilbert blindly took a bite of the wurst and chewed. It was squishy and disgusting and _what the hell is this?_ It was strangely salty in a chemical-tasting kind of way, and left his tongue feeling coated with a slippery substance. He swallowed and shivered, cringing hard.

He opened his eyes and looked at his brother, who was biting on his lower lip to keep from smiling.

"…that wasn't wurst, was it?"

"It was Play-Doh." Ludwig finally smiled and nearly chuckled at the end of his sentence.

"You little-!" Gilbert reached over and tried to grab Ludwig's neck, but the younger smacked his hands away and pushed off of his stool. The older started off his own seat and ran after Ludwig, who wove around the counter and into the hallway.

"When'd you get so slow, Gilbert?" Ludwig called as he wrenched open the front door. "Quit drinking so much beer and maybe you'll be able to catch up to me!"

Gilbert followed him and jumped over the porch steps, laughing all the way. Ludwig was quicker than you'd probably expect. He dashed around the side of the house and hopped the fence, almost falling and shouting insults back at Gilbert again. Gilbert stuck his tongue out and turned, cutting across their yard to lock the gate to the backyard. He smirked when Ludwig skidded to a halt behind the gate. He cursed under his breath, laughed, and spun around to try and make it to the back door. Gilbert's hand shot out and grabbed the collar of Ludwig's shirt, choking his younger brother unintentionally and making him fall. Ludwig stood, coughing and gagging while Gilbert unlocked the gate. He grabbed Ludwig by his middle and hauled him up against him, dragging the younger with him as he backed up to the front yard.

"Ah! Gilbert! Stop, that hurts!" Ludwig wiggled around the tried to get free. Gilbert dropped him by a large tree and sat beside him.

They huffed and panted from the sudden adrenaline rush and collapsed onto the grass.

"Don't you ever make me eat Play-Doh again, understand?"

"Yes, sir." Ludwig groaned into the earth.

"Because if you do, I'll rip your balls off and feed them to the ducks by the pond."

"That's disgusting."

"They're your balls, not mine."

Ludwig just sighed and closed his eyes. He heard a soft thump and figured it was just Gilbert falling against the grass. It was silent for a while, until the faint sound of shoes clicking on concrete echoed down the street.

"Your boyfriend is coming." Gilbert snickered.

Ludwig didn't respond. He sat up inconspicuously, watching the Italian walk on the far side of the sidewalk with about four or five plastic bags of groceries hanging from his hands.

"Those look heavy. I should go help him." Ludwig muttered and stood.

"Agh, you're such a gentleman that it hurts. I'm going inside." The older boy stood slowly, then yawned and ventured back into the house. Ludwig tried to look as if he was just taking a walk and happened to notice Feliciano by chance.

The Italian noticed him first. His whole face lit up as the German neared.

"Hi! Are you going for a walk all by yourself?" he asked, setting down one of the bags to curl his fingers and pick it up again.

"Yeah, it's nice out. Can I help you with those?"

"Would you? That's so nice! Hey, maybe we could take a walk together after I drop these off!" Feliciano smiled and handed Ludwig two of the bags. The German boy took another one just to be polite.

"But you just walked to the store and back with all these heavy bags. Aren't you tired?" he asked as they walked at a snail's pace.

"Mmm, sort of. I don't mind if I get to walk with you, though."

Ludwig watched Feliciano's Converse-clad feet match the movement of his own.

"Oh…but if I do get tired, would you mind carrying me home? Ve, sometimes I get so tired that I forget how to walk…" the Italian chewed his lip thoughtfully and looked up at Ludwig.

"I don't mind. Gilbert's like that, too."

"You carry your brother to bed?"

"Ah…um…well, it sounds weird when you say it like that...but I guess so. I get worried if he sleeps on the couch when he's drunk and passed out, so I carry him to his room…" Ludwig could feel the tips of his ears burning.

"Wow! You must be really strong to carry Mr. Gilbert like that!"

"…let's get these groceries inside…"

"Okay~!"

When arriving at Feliciano's house, Lovino had made it very clear that Ludwig wasn't allowed to come inside. Feliciano put the groceries away himself, despite Ludwig's protests, and apologized when he came back outside.

"I'm really sorry. I don't know why fratello doesn't like you so much. It's not like you're mean or anything…"

"It's alright. It probably has something to do with the fact that I'm related to Gilbert…"

"Hm. Does your world revolve around your brother or something? You two hang out an awful lot."

"What? No! He's just the main source of all my problems."

"Oh."

The pair walked down the middle of the street quietly. It was still light out despite it being around 8:30 at night. Feliciano stared up at the dimming sky while Ludwig watched their shadows grow longer. The crickets hadn't come out for the night yet, though the locusts were eagerly croaking to one another.

"Oh! Do you hear the cicadas?" Feliciano asked quickly, as if he had just noticed their noise. He gripped Ludwig's arm excitedly. Ludwig shyly broke the grasp.

"Cicadas? I thought they were locusts."

Feli shook his head, "No, they're two different things. Locusts are pretty much grasshoppers, ve. Cicadas are the ones that make the noise in the summer."

"Huh. Well I do hear them. I hate the noise, though. They're so loud."

"Awh!" Feliciano grabbed his arm yet again, but this time Ludwig let him stay. "I love the noise they make! That's how you know it's really summertime!"

"I thought you knew it was summer when you wake up and it's well passed noon."

Feliciano giggled at the joke and let his arm go.

The two walked a few blocks to the little park, where Feliciano wanted to swing for a while. When the sky looked burnt on the edges and ready to blacken, Ludwig suggested they head for home.

"Ludwig, remember how I said that if I get tired, you might have to carry me?"

Ludwig tripped on the curb and replied, "Yeah."

"…well, could you carry me?" Feli asked and turned around.

"…S-Sure. Um…I'd prefer if I carried you piggyback, though. If that's okay with you…" he said and rubbed his neck.

"Yeah!" Feliciano got up on the curb while Ludwig stood in front of him. The German counted to three and braced himself when Feli hopped onto his back and wrapped his arms around his shoulders. Ludwig staggered for a moment, and then regained his balance.

"You're kinda heavy for a little guy." He muttered and Feliciano gently swatted at his head.

"Don't be mean!"

Ludwig decided to take a different route, venturing passed their normal sidewalk to take a detour.

"Where are we going? Oh, hey! It's Kiku's house! Hi Kiku!" Feliciano yelled at someone sitting outside a house across the road. Ludwig sighed and walked over, expecting them to converse for a bit.

"Oh, hello." Kiku barely smiled at the two. He stood from the chair he was sitting in and walked over to them. Feliciano slid off of Ludwig's back and skipped over to Kiku.

"Kiku! I haven't seen you in years!" he cried and hugged the Japanese boy.

"I-it's only been a month since school let out…please stop touching me…"

"…Anyway!" Feli half turned behind himself and grabbed Ludwig's wrist, pulling him into their conversation. "This is my best friend! His name is Ludwig!"

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Ludwig-san." He bowed. Ludwig blinked.

"Likewise. Um…Feliciano, it's getting really late, and I don't want your brother to get mad at you for spending time with me…"

"Oh, I'm sure he won't mind me playing with you for a little bit!" Feliciano smiled and patted his shoulder.

"P-playing…?" Ludwig blushed. Kiku formed a slight smile from watching the two.

"Well, alright, if you _insist, _then I guess we'll go. I'll see you later, Kiku!" Feli waved at the boy right in front of him. Kiku waved back.

"Goodbye, Feli-kun, Ludwig-san."

Ludwig gave a curt nod before Feliciano jumped on his back like a monkey. He started walking away too soon to notice the small flash of a camera go off behind him.

It was incredibly dark by the time they reached Feliciano's house, and both were thankful for the lone street light on the corner. The Italian got off of Ludwig's back and turned around to face him.

"Um…thanks for letting me go with you. And letting me ride on your back. And for helping me carry the groceries." Feli smiled a dorky little smile that made Ludwig just as happy.

"It's fine. I don't mind at all. I…I had fun. So thanks."

"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" Feli said and looked up at his friend.

"Okay."

And they stood for a moment with Feli staring up at him and Ludwig looking back down at the Italian. It didn't seem awkward in the least, though both could only hear the blood pounding in their ears. Suddenly, Feliciano reached out and pulled Ludwig into a tight hug, not unlike the first time they had met. Ludwig paused for a moment, astonished, and eventually hugged him back.

When they broke apart, which seemed like hours later, Feliciano couldn't wipe the grin off his face and Ludwig figured his face might blow up from the heat. The Italian clumsily headed up to his own doorstep and disappeared inside, while Ludwig stared at the ground.

His heart was beating angrily as his eyebrows knitted together with thought. His gaze was pointed at his scuffed shoes although his vision seemed blurred.

_When did I start feeling this way?_

* * *

><p><strong>Oh yes. Gilbert works at Francis' fancy French restaurant. ;)<strong>

**I'm sorry if it bothers you that I took out the h's when Francis speaks. I don't know why, but I love how the French can't pronounce the letter h, so I felt the need to take it out. I might put it back in at a later time if it irritates people.**

**FFfff anyway, I hope you enjoyed it! Review n' junk, if you wouldn't mind!**


	6. Chapter 6

"Good morning, sunshine!"

"Get out of my face."

"But it's morning! You need to get up!"

"Why? …And get off of my bed!"

"Because I'm feeling generous today. I want to take you out to breakfast!"

"Fine! But get off of _me, _Gilbert!" 

Gilbert stood up from sitting on his little brother and left the room. Ludwig groaned after the door clicked shut. He sat up and yawned, rubbing at his tired, dry eyes. He hadn't gotten much sleep, and what sleep he did get was rather light. He slumped out of bed and took his time getting dressed, as his head was still spinning in and out of awareness from being woken up from a dream.

The older boy was waiting in the foyer rather impatiently, tapping his foot against the hardwood floor. He grinned when he saw Ludwig descend from the stairs.

"You gelled your hair again?" he asked and ceased his tapping.

"What? Oh. Yeah, I did." The younger paused in front of Gilbert with a concerned expression. "Does it look stupid?"

"Nah, it looks fine." Gilbert assured him, slapping a hand on his shoulder. "You look like a real ladies' man, like m'self."

"Oh, God…" Ludwig mumbled as he was escorted out the door. 

They arrived at a little café downtown, where a faded sign hung above a brand new wooden door. Gilbert opened the door for himself and nearly closed it on Ludwig's foot as he entered. The inside was modestly decorated with warm colors and dull, hanging lights. Only a few people were there, chewing on biscuits or sipping at coffee. Ludwig looked around as Gilbert led him to the little bar up front.

No one seemed to be manning the bar, and only one waitress was looming around the floor. Ludwig was a little confused as to why his brother, the "I'm too good for everything" Gilbert, would take him to such a homey place. The door to the kitchen flapped open and a goodhearted laugh was muffled by the sound of clanging pots. The person made their way behind the bar and smiled to himself. He apparently hadn't noticed his two new costumers.

"Yo, Antonio!" Gilbert called after a little while. The bartender paused and turned, then smiled again.

"Eyy, Gilbert! What are you doing here, man?"

"I decided I would be awesome and nice today and take my baby bro out for breakfast!" Gilbert grinned again and slapped Ludwig on the back.

"Well that's very nice of you!" Antonio looked at Ludwig for a moment and widened his eyes as he realized something.

"Oh, hey! I know you! You're Feli's friend, right?" he leaned on the counter as Ludwig nodded. "Lovi hates you. But don't worry about it, man. As long as Feli likes you then there's nothing he can really do about it."

Ludwig blinked and swallowed. How was he supposed to respond to that…?

"Plus," Antonio held up a finger. "I like you! So that cancels out the hate even more!"

"Uhh…well….thanks, I suppose."

"Don't mention it, amigo. Would you guys like some coffee?"

"Yeahhh," Gilbert sighed as he stretched out his arms. "That sounds nice."

"I'll have some too, thanks."

"O~kay!" Antonio disappeared into the kitchen again. 

"I thought you said you didn't know that guy." Ludwig started, looking towards his brother.

"Who, Antonio? Yeah, well, I didn't know him very well when I told you that, obviously. I come here every day for my lunch break. He's always the bartender here so I've spilled my story to him on more than one occasion."

"That's…ah…weird."

"Shut up."

Gilbert tapped a finger on the counter, which turned into two fingers drumming, and then all of his fingers marching in a band on the edge.

"Quit it. You fidget too much." Ludwig muttered and sent a harsh glare in his brother's direction.

"Tch. Geez." Gilbert snorted and leaned back on his stool.

He tilted his head back and watched as two people came in the door. It was a couple; a girl with long, wavy, dirty blond hair and dark green eyes clinging to the arm of a tall fellow with dark brown locks and a pair of sophisticated glasses perched on his nose.

Gilbert nearly choked on his own spit as he whipped his head forward again and banged it on the counter.

"Scheiße!" he yelled and held his nose.

"Whoa, bruder, are you okay?"

"Like hell I'm okay! We have to leave _right now_."

"What? Why?"

Gilbert leaned close and whispered, "Elizaveta's here with her boy toy. We _have to leave!"_

"But what about the coffee?"

"Fuck the coffee! This is more important!"

And with that, Gilbert grabbed Ludwig's wrist and ran, dodging the edges of tables as he headed for the door. He promptly smacked into the nice, clean door before he realized it was there. He wasted no time in yanking it open, pulling his brother with him, and getting Ludwig's foot caught in the door this time. The kitchen door swung open just moments later, welcoming an uncertain Spaniard chatting unknowingly to the empty stools about how all he had was instant coffee for himself. 

Gilbert rushed him to the car and drove for a bit, stopping at the little lake by their neighborhood. Gilbert got out immediately and sat on top of one of the picnic tables while Ludwig stood to his right. They sat in silence for a while, listening to the noisy ducks and the whispering wind.

"That was a little uncalled for, you know." Ludwig said, finally taking a seat next to his brother.

"Yeah, sorry. I just had to get out of there."

Ludwig nodded even though he had no clue what Gilbert meant.

"Let me tell you a story. On my first day of work, I saw this really hot chick standing by the kitchen. So, you know, I was being my sexy Gilbert self, and I was all, 'Hey hot lady,' and she said, 'Get back to work, Gilbert.' So I flipped out and called her a bitchy old hag."

"…and?"

"And it turns out that she was my boss. And she was actually a man."

Ludwig glanced at his brother, confused.

"The moral of the story: Don't hit on girls in your workplace, because she might be your boss. Or a man. Or, in Elizaveta's case, already taken."

"That's…uh, nice."

"Speaking of which, how come you don't have a nice girlfriend?" Gilbert asked and turned towards Ludwig.

The younger paused and blinked, then looked at the grass.

"I…I don't really know. I guess I'm just not interested in falling in love."

"What about that girl you had a crush on in, like, 5th grade? Ah, good ol' what's her face..."

"Melissa."

"Yeah! Melissa! What a horrible name."

"Melissa isn't a horrible name, arschloch!"

"You're right; you know what a horrible name is?"

"What?"

"Ludwig."

Ludwig growled and leaped at his brother, knocking him off the table and onto the ground. Gilbert laughed and shook his sibling off.

"What happened to her, anyway?" he asked, folding his hands behind his silver head.

"Who?"

"Melissa."

"Oh. Um...I dunno. I just stopped liking her. She wasn't really all that nice, anyway. She was pretty, I guess, but she was kind of a whore in junior high."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah."

Ludwig copied Gilbert's pose and shoved his hands behind his own head.

Turning his glance at his brother, Gilbert questioned, "You said you weren't interested in falling in love, right?"

"…Eh, well, it's not so much that I'm not interested…"

"Elaborate."

"You'll laugh."

"No I won't!"

"I know you will!"

"What if I promise?"

"Pinky swear."

"Lame."

"Well, I'm not going to elephant swear with you!"

"Fine!"

Gilbert shoved his pinky in Ludwig's direction. The younger stuck his out, too, and curled it around his brother's. They both tugged until their tie broke, indicating that Gilbert's promise was solid. Ludwig took a deep breath.

"I'm afraid to."

"…to what?"

"Fall in love, idiot! I don't think I could handle it…"

Gilbert stared, his eyes half-lidded and his gaze was serious. He cracked a smile and giggled, then closed his eyes and busted out laughing. Ludwig sat up and blushed.

"See? I knew you would laugh!" he spat, hurt and angry.

"Pffft, Aww, ha ha! Poor Luddy is afraid of falling in love!"

"Shut up!"

"Eh heh heh…heh…ahhh…that was rich." Gilbert mumbled while wiping a nonexistent tear from his right eye. Ludwig was hiding his reddened face in his arms while his legs were tucked into his chest.

"Lud? …Ludwig? Aw, hey, I'm sorry. I understand."

Ludwig turned his head slightly, peeking at Gilbert with one icy blue eye. "Really?"

"Sure. Falling in love is dangerous. That's why you shouldn't even bother with it. Flirting freely and showing off your manliness is so much more fun."

"...so I'm only supposed to be concerned with being an annoying flirt? That's a great idea, thanks Gil." Ludwig rolled his eyes and lay back on the ground again.

"No, no. That's not what I'm saying. ...yeah, okay, that's what I'm saying. It's just that guys your age aren't usually focused on love. Too much testosterone and adrenaline to be worried about sissy things like that."

"So I'm a sissy now?"

"No! Look at you, you're the opposite of a sissy boy! …Okay, yeah. But only because you're concerned with l-o-v-e." Gilbert drew a heart in the air with his index fingers.

"Well gee, sorry for being able to think with my brain and not my dick like you."

"Hey, no, that's a good thing! I commend you for keeping it in your pants and not knocking some girl up, bruder." He threw Ludwig a thumbs up.

"That's gross."

"...wearing an invisible chastity ring?"

"No, knocking a girl up. I can't believe some guys are such pigs as to getting a girl pregnant when she's still in school."

"The girl usually consents, you know. She's probably the one who's in too much of a hurry to make the guy wear a condom."

"Shut up, I don't need hear that!" Ludwig turned over onto his side, away from his brother and watched the waves on the lake. They rose and fell like the water was alive and breathing deeply.

"Aw! Is little Luddy shy?" Gilbert reached over to try ruffling Ludwig's gelled hair. It didn't work so well.

"Don't touch me! I just don't want to hear that."

"Ah ha ha, did I just ruin your innocence or something?"

"No! I just can't imagine doing that sort of thing with a girl at all!"

"...what? ...what does that even mean? You don't think about girls like that?"

"No, that's sick."

"It's not sick. You're just...what the hell's wrong with you? You're like what, 16? How do you contain yourself so well?"

"I don't know. I just don't find messing around with girls like that appealing."

"...Oh my God. Oh my God, something _is_ wrong with you." The older boy stood and towered over Ludwig. "Wait." He sat again, cross-legged at his brother's side. "Is it appealing if you blindfold her?"

"No."

"Gag her?"

"That's cruel."

"...tie her up? Make her wear leather?"

"No! Well, no. Not with a girl."

"Not with a girl, you say?"

"No."

"...you don't like girls."

Ludwig watched as the leaves on the tall trees fluttered and ruffled in the breeze. He thought for a moment. Sure, he liked girls. He'd seen some really pretty ones walking down the street and cute ones at the mall. He wasn't crazy about them like Gilbert was. He didn't think it was very polite or civilized to hit on them and try to collect their phone numbers like stamps. Plus, it wasn't in his nature to flirt openly like that.

"I like them. They're...soft."

"Soft, you say."

"Yeah. Sure."

"Oh, dude. Soft. _Soft._"

"Yes, okay? Girls are soft!"

"You, my good man, are in trouble. No wonder you don't have a girlfriend! You don't even know how to properly describe one!"

"I don't think about them every single waking moment of my life, you know! I have other things to concern myself with!"

"Right, like being a prude and hanging around that fruity Italian kid."

"Hey, don't be mean."

"I'm not being mean. I'm telling the truth. That's kid's pretty damn gay."

"And? He's really nice and sort of crazy, but I have a lot of fun with him."

"Right. Because _you _know how to have fun."

Ludwig punched his brother.

"So…do you like Elizaveta?" he asked, trying to change the subject.

"No way!" Gilbert snorted. He looked away for a second. "Well, I don't know. Maybe. I just hate her boyfriend's guts."

"Why? What'd he do to you?"

"I don't wanna talk about it." Gilbert stood up. "Well, I'm bored. I'm gonna take you home and go find something to do."

"Tch, okay." 

When Gilbert pulled up in the drive, Ludwig stepped out of the car and stretched. Gilbert pulled away in an instant, leaving Ludwig by himself. He didn't feel like going inside yet, so he sat on the porch steps and watched the sky. The clouds, masses of white-gray cotton candy floating amidst a sea of baby blue, swirled and mixed with one another. The wind had picked up a bit, blowing against Ludwig and making his shirt blow in tiny waves against his abdomen. He heard a sniffling drift on the air and across the yard, making him shift his attention to the house beside him.

It was Feliciano, sitting on his own porch steps and wiping at his eyes. Ludwig sighed and slumped, pinching the bridge of his nose. He really should go see what was wrong, but something told him he was just going to have to listen to his friend babble in Italian for a while.

He stood anyway and made his way over. Feliciano hadn't noticed anyone coming and was wiping his nose against his shirt sleeve. Ludwig cringed before stepping closer.

"Feliciano? Are you okay?"

The Italian jumped and yelled, a few fresh tears slipping down his cheeks. He held his arms up to cover his face and hiccupped.

"Hey, calm down. It's just me." Ludwig gently took Feliciano's wrists and pulled them away from his face. The brunet sniffed and opened his eyes, even though his vision was blurred by tears.

"O-oh, hello." He said quietly, taking his hands back to wipe his eyes.

"Why are you crying?" Ludwig asked and sat on the concrete path in front of Feliciano.

"U-uhm…Well, I…" he started, pausing to breathe. His voice was soft and trembling. "I did something that made fratello r-really mad…"

Ludwig listened, resting his head in his hands.

"I…I ate all the pasta last night as a midnight snack…a-and fratello woke up and didn't get to have any morning pastaaaa!" he cried hard and let out a whine.

Ludwig shook his head. "You're crying over _pasta? _That's ridiculous."

Feli whined again and clutched the bottom of his long-sleeved shirt. Ludwig rubbed the side of his face and stood, reaching for Feli's hands again. He took them in his own and gently pulled, willing the weeping boy to stand.

"There, there. I'll take you to the store and you can buy as much pasta as you want, okay?"

His sadness instantly vanished and a sweet smile replaced his frown. He hugged the German happily.

"Ve~! Thank you, Ludwig! Thank you so much!"

"Yeah, yeah…" Ludwig mumbled and patted Feli's head.

Now, if only he had a car…

* * *

><p><strong>Ah, I apologize for all the dialogue. I like dialogue, though. Hah.<strong>

**And as a silly side note, I have these chapters labeled in French on my computer. So I was all, "Woo! Chapter six!" and then I realized that six is, well, six in French.**

**So it wasn't all that exciting. /cries**


	7. Chapter 7

**Yesterday, I found out that I'm partially German. I now understand why there are so many cans of sauerkraut in the spice cabinet. Now, is it bad if I hate sauerkraut **_**and **_**sausage? If I hate beer when I'm older, I'll be some kind of abomination since I'm also Irish. /shot**

* * *

><p>"Ve…will we have to walk?" Feliciano asked and tilted his head.<p>

"Yeah. Gilbert drove off somewhere and I don't have a car of my own to drive." The blond answered.

Feliciano stood, looking like he was deep in thought. A sinister smile spread from ear to ear before he looked up at Ludwig.

"Fratello has a car in the garage. If I can sneak into his room and get the keys without him noticing, then we can take his car." He mentioned in a low voice. Ludwig frowned.

"That doesn't sound like a very good idea. What if he catches you?"

"It's okay. He might yell at me for a bit and I might cry, but you'll just have to trust that I can do it."

Ludwig thought for a moment and blinked. "Alright."

Feliciano smiled and stepped away, making his way up the porch steps and to the door. He carefully pulled open the heavy door and slipped inside. Ludwig sat on the steps and waited.

On the inside, Feliciano's house seemed a bit small, but only because of the large furniture placed nearly everywhere. To his right were the stairs going downward that led to his room, whereas the floor of the living room and the archway to the kitchen were right in front of him. He could hear clanging of pots in the kitchen and cheerful singing, signifying that Lovino was in the kitchen and thought he was entirely alone.

Feliciano slipped off his shoes and carried them in one hand so he could slide quietly across the hardwood flooring. He shuffled to the archway of the kitchen and sidled against the wall, peering carefully around the corner to see where exactly Lovino was standing. His brother had his back to the entry and was standing at the sink, alternating between humming and singing while scrubbing a used pan. Feli slid across the opening quickly and checked to make sure the older hadn't noticed. He carried on down the hall and took a left at the very end, tiptoeing into Lovino's room.

The queen sized bed was unmade and clothes were strewn everywhere. A single, worn (with love) guitar was sitting in the corner on Antonio's side of the room. The pale dresser was at the foot of the bed and Lovino's car keys sat in a misshapen, handmade and painted bowl. Feliciano recognized it as one he had made when they were little. He smiled again and gently picked up the keys by the ring, making sure it did not clink against the glazed bowl.

He then quickly shoved the keys into his pocket and slid out of the room, stepping quietly down the hall, passed the kitchen and to the door to the garage. He twisted the doorknob slowly, singing along in his head to the familiar song about tomatoes that Lovino was humming.

He opened the door cautiously, thinking the creaking noise might startle his brother, yet he really had nothing to worry about. He stepped inside and pressed his back against the door, slowly pushing it back into the frame. He paused when he heard it click shut and held his breath. He waited a moment, but nothing happened, so he exhaled deeply. He then threw his shoes onto the floor and slipped his feet back into them. He stepped down off the frame and onto the floor, walking over to the garage door. For some odd reason, it wasn't automatic, so he had to push it up himself. He reached down, grabbed the handle with both hands, and tugged, nearly squeaking when it came up faster than he intended.

Ludwig heard the garage door being pushed open. He stood and peeked over at it, watching as it ascended and revealed a beaming Italian clutching a bundle of keys. Feliciano tossed the keys to him and ran over to the passenger side, waiting for Ludwig to unlock the doors. Ludwig stared at the keys for a while, trying to find the little button with the picture of a padlock on it.

Feliciano sighed and leaned against the deep blue Camry. "Is it really that hard?"

"Shut up." Ludwig muttered and stepped over to the car to unlock it manually. Feliciano jumped in immediately. Ludwig slipped inside and carefully shut the door, trying not to be loud for the sake of remaining unknown to Lovino's ears. He shoved the key into the ignition and twisted; the car rumbling to life. "Goddamn, it smells like garlic in here…"

They backed out of the drive and turned, heading down the cul-de-sac and onto the main road. The store was just down the road and to the right, so it didn't take long to get there, even on foot; but driving was faster and less stressful in the summer heat. They hadn't talked during the drive but Ludwig figured it was just because Feliciano was excited to get his pasta.

Ludwig parked the car close to the entrance and waited for Feliciano to get out before locking it and heading to the entry. The grocery store, which was creatively named "Food Mart", wasn't much to marvel at. It was relatively small and didn't sell very many brands of sweet-smelling shampoos like Ludwig had hoped, but they weren't exactly there for hair care products anyway.

Feliciano immediately flocked to what Gilbert liked to call the "Hamburger Helper and Friends" isle, where all the boxes of quick dinners and pasta noodles were. The Italian started to inspect every single box, carefully picking different brands of the same type of noodle. He soon had an armful of spaghetti and linguini noodles, and ran to Ludwig to ask about getting a hand basket for them. The German complied and watched with mild horror as the basket quickly filled. There were five different boxes of spaghetti, three boxes of linguini, three boxes of fettuccine, and a giant bag of frozen tortellini. He had also gotten a few jars of alfredo and marinara sauce. Ludwig then decided he should probably get some shampoo while he had the chance.

The pair made their way to the shampoo, which was stacked by the shelves of birthday cards. He skimmed through the various scents and brands, finally picking a light blue bottle of green apple scented shampoo and conditioner. He then turned to Feliciano, who was happily clutching a stuffed lion. Its mane was fluffy and orange.

"…what is that? Where'd you get it?" He asked while trying to fit the shampoo into the basket.

"I found it by the Animal Crackers! Isn't it cute? Can I get it?" Feli hugged the doll.

Ludwig's eyebrow twitched. He'd have to pay for all that pasta, and the sauce, and his shampoo, _and _the lion doll, with all of his own money. He hung his head and pinched the bridge of his nose for a moment.

"Yeah, go ahead." He finally nodded, figuring Feliciano would be depressed if he denied him the right of his lion.

"Ah, grazie, Ludwig!" Feliciano cheered and hugged the lion once more.

There was no one at the checkout line, which was normal. The cashier seemed to be asleep, as his head was resting on the buttons of the register. Ludwig and Feliciano stood in front of him, debating whether to wake him up or not. Ludwig started putting all their items on the conveyer belt while Feliciano poked the cashier's cheek. He blinked and woke up, not making a noise as he started scanning the boxes of pasta. The man was tall and tan, his hair a typical brown color with tufts hanging in front of his ears. One strand of hair that split into two little curls sprouted at the back of his head. He scanned each box slowly and indifferently, no particular expression on his face. Feli handed over the lion doll reluctantly.

The cashier looked at it and squeezed its stomach, then scanned the tag on its tail.

"Cute kitty." He mumbled and sent it down the belt. Feliciano tilted his head.

Ludwig sent Feli to bag the items while he paid. He handed over a few bills and the cashier took them slowly, taking his time as he counted each one and put them in the register. He pushed a few buttons on the screen nonchalantly and scratched his shoulder. He reached inside the tray and took out some change, putting one coin at a time in Ludwig's hand. The German boy stared strangely, confused at his slow nature. The cashier then yawned and tore the receipt from the machine and handed it to him. He resumed his nap against the cash register as soon as Feli bagged the last box of pasta.

The clouds had cleared and the wind had died down, leaving everything to bake in the sunshine and lack of air. They strolled across the hot pavement with four plastic bags in hand. Ludwig's hands, anyway. The car was practically steaming and burned when either touched the door handle. They both quickly sat inside and closed the doors; Ludwig turning on the car hurriedly to try and get the AC on as fast as he could. Feliciano set the stuffed animal down by his feet and helped shove the grocery bags in the back seat. He yelped when he felt his jeans pocket vibrating. He took out his phone and pulled a lopsided frown.

"It's fratello." He said to Ludwig, who had held back on beginning to drive.

"Ciao!" Feliciano chirped as he answered his phone.

"_Where the hell's my car?"_ Lovino shouted into the receiver.

"We took it to get some pasta!"

"_What? …what do you mean, 'we'? Who's with you?"_

"Me and Ludwig."

"_The potato bastard?"_

"…Potato bastard? That's not very nice."

"_Quit hanging out with that macho jerk! He's going to infect you with his German germs!"_

"German germs? …are you serious? That's ridiculous, fratello."

"_If you don't die by that, then he'll kill you himself. People of his kind are merciless, I'm telling you."_

"You're so silly! Ludwig won't ever hurt me! Right, Ludwig?" Feli turned to his friend.

"…what?" Ludwig, confused, snapped the cap back onto the bottle of shampoo he was sniffing. It really did smell good…better than the burnt rubber scent they had at home…

"Lovi says you're going to hurt me. But you won't, right?"

"…right."

"See, Lovi? Ludwig said it himself!"

"_He's probably lying!"_

"He wouldn't lie to me! He's not a bad person. Don't you remember what grandpa said about judging people?"

"_Don't fucking preach to me like I'm stupid! Don't you dare mention that worthless excuse for a man to me again!"_ Lovino yelled loud enough that even Ludwig heard it. Feliciano cringed and closed his eyes, a strange sense of sadness spreading to his heart. Lovino was silent.

"I'll have your car home in a few minutes." Feliciano said, just above a whisper. He hung up before his brother could respond. He shoved his cell phone into his pocket and rubbed at his eyes, then turned and smiled at Ludwig.

"Let's go home, okay?"

"…yeah, okay." And Ludwig began to drive.

Lovino's car was parked and left in the driveway as the pair retrieved their groceries. Ludwig fished out his own purchases before handing the bags of pasta boxes to Feliciano, who was tightly holding the lion in one hand.

"Thank you, Ludwig." He said sweetly and took the bag.

"You're welcome. Uh…I guess I'll see you around, then." He started walking down the driveway, but was interrupted by a yell.

"WAIT!" Feliciano shouted unintentionally. Ludwig stopped and stared. "U-uhm…School starts in a week, you know."

"Yeah, I know." He really didn't. Gilbert must've sent in the registration forms without him knowing. Believe it or not, Gilbert was the kind of person to do that.

"And…well…as a last hoorah type thing, Miss Elizaveta wanted me to ask you if you'd like to go to the pool with us tomorrow. Us being me, her, and Roderich." Feli smiled to try and look convincing.

"Oh…ah, sure. I suppose."

"Great!I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Alright."

Feliciano beamed and rushed inside, leaving Ludwig on the sidewalk, alone. The blond boy sighed and shook his head, making his way to his house.

Gilbert had come home and made dinner, leaving a plate in the fridge for Ludwig. After he heated up and ate the rather poorly made dinner, he headed up to bed. It was a little early, 8 at night, but he was utterly tired for no apparent reason. And school was starting soon, which meant he'd have to save up his energy and start going to bed earlier anyway.

School…he'd be going to a new one, wouldn't he? His parents wouldn't want him back yet after spending such a short time here with Gilbert. They probably would think he hadn't quite learned whatever lesson they expected him to get out of it. He'd have to make all new friends, which was hard enough as it is. Ludwig wasn't exactly a social butterfly. Next to that, he'd have to get used to the new teachers, piles of homework, perhaps some disgusting lunches, and all the cliques who would probably label him something absurd…

Maybe spending a relaxing day at the pool tomorrow would keep his mind off of school for a while.

"Hey, Ludwig!" Gilbert called from downstairs in the morning. "Your buddy is here!"

Ludwig groaned and got out of bed, quickly putting on his red swimming trunks and a plain white shirt. He clumsily headed down the stairs and nearly tripped over the last step when he saw Feliciano…

…wearing tight, yellow swim shorts.

"Ciao!" He smiled and waved at Ludwig, who was nearly staring at him.

"U-um…uh…I-I guess we'll be going then." Ludwig said to Gilbert, feeling his cheeks flame up. Gilbert waggled his eyebrows.

"Sure, sure. Have fun. Don't drown or get herpes or whatever."

"What?" Ludwig called back, but was pushed through the front door by Feli.

The ride to the pool was relatively short. They walked up to the glossy, black gate and lifted the latch. Once the gate was open, the smell of sunscreen and iced tea floated to them. The pool was nearly empty despite it being unbearably hot outside. Feliciano ran on the scorching concrete to a group of plastic lounge chairs, where he hastily spread a towel on one and sat. He smiled at the other three, motioning them to come on over. Ludwig nearly ran as well, taking off his shirt as he neared the seats. Elizaveta was shifting her weight onto one foot and then the other, leaving one in the air long enough to cool before touching the hot floor again. Roderich walked with her, spreading out another towel on one chair for her to sit on. She smiled and complied, watching him do the same for himself.

Ludwig picked up a bottle of sunscreen and squeezed some onto his fingers, then spread it on his arms and torso. If he didn't put anything on, he'd most likely get burnt and raw, making it impossible to lie down without a horrible sting for a week.

Feliciano moved to sit at the foot of Ludwig's chair, smiling at him. "Do you need any help? I can put some on your back if you'd like."

"No!" he denied, then calmed down when he saw Feliciano's expression. "…I…oh God, this is embarrassing…"

"Ve, I didn't mean to make it sound weird…I'm sorry…" Feliciano leaned back and frowned. "I'm sure Miss Elizaveta wouldn't mind doing it for you, if you don't want me to."

"…It's not that I don't want you to, it's just…" he looked away and tried to hide his growing blush.

"You know, if I needed sunscreen, I'd let you help me. But I don't need any since I don't get sunburned. Besides, it'll only take a second. And it's only your back, right?" he tried and smiled. Ludwig sighed.

"Alright, alright…"

Elizaveta smiled as she watched the two. They really were good for each other, but it was taking them an awful long time to realize it…

She looked over at Roderich and nearly cracked up. He was watching them too, but with a less pleasant expression. He looked over at her with confused face, and mouthed, "Are they together…?" She nodded with a smirk. Of course they weren't really together, but Roderich wouldn't ask them any direct questions if he knew they were. Sometimes you just gotta lie.

When Feli was finished with putting sunscreen on Ludwig's back, he grabbed the German's wrist and pulled him towards the pool. It smelled heavily of chlorine and nearly made his nose burn, but he jumped in along with Feli anyway. They swam around for a bit, enjoying the way the water cooled their heated skin. Feliciano suggest they play a game.

"How about we play Marco Pasta?" he asked with a wide smile.

"…Marco Pasta? No way, I don't want to do that in a public pool. Besides, it's Marco _Polo, _you dummkopf!"

They eventually played it anyway, even though Ludwig refused to say Pasta instead of Polo. Elizaveta and Roderich watched from the side of the pool as they dipped their feet in the water. Roderich had set down a towel for both of them to sit on instead of the hard, hot concrete. Soon the boys got hungry and reluctantly stepped out of the pool to order some nachos at the concession stand. They split the order back at their lawn chairs, and occasionally Ludwig would accuse Feliciano of double-dipping in the melted cheese, to which the Italian would loudly deny.

And as they say, time flies when you're having fun. They had spent the rest of their time relaxing in the sun. Feliciano though it would be fun to share a lawn chair with Ludwig, so the German let him squeeze next to him and lay his head on his pale shoulder (oh damn, the contrast between their skin was rather surprising).

When the sun decided it had had enough of the blue sky around it, it retreated back behind the trees and caused the atmosphere to turn dark. Frogs began to croak along with the early crickets. Elizaveta suggested going home, and everyone agreed; save for Feli, who wanted to lie next to Ludwig for a little longer.

The car pulled up in Elizaveta's driveway. Ludwig and Feliciano thanked them for the ride and began walking to their own homes. Ludwig had made it to his own drive and watched to make sure Feli got in his own house without any trouble. But, about halfway from Ludwig's yard to Feli's house, he had stopped.

"…what's wrong?" he asked, cupping his hands around his mouth to make the message reach farther. Feliciano didn't answer. Ludwig looked over to his house, and as he watched, the world around him grew silent and he understood.

The lights were on in the Vargas household; bright enough to cast shadows on the light drapes. Muffled yelling could be heard from even where Ludwig was. Antonio and Lovino were fighting, shouting slurs at each other and throwing pillows. They went from pillows to books and a TV remote, and even a lamp that crashed against the floor and dimmed the light a bit. Feliciano turned around and ran to Ludwig. He had tears in his eyes and was wringing his hands with the towel he had brought.

"I…I can't stay there. They do that sometimes, and they always make up in the morning, but…I can't stay there right now…" he whispered and looked down.

Ludwig put a hand on his shoulder, making him look up. "You can stay the night."

"Really? You'd let me?" he barely smiled; he was still overcome with fear from the sounds coming from his house.

"Yeah." He said simply and led the Italian up his driveway.

He knew what he was getting himself into, and he was going to regret it later. He might not get any sleep knowing Feliciano was in his room. They might even have to share his bed…he wasn't about to let a guest sleep on his floor. Gilbert would probably start asking him some serious questions in the morning, like, "Did you finally get laid?" and "Was Elizaveta wearing a sexy bikini?"

Not that he was going to answer those.

* * *

><p><strong>Wah, I know I was pretty vague with the pool trip, but c'mon…it's midnight here and I'm le tiiired. T^T shot**

****How come no one told me this was entirely in bold? Ah, well, I fixed it, you jerks.**

**I'm just kidding, I love all of you~!**


	8. Chapter 8

**Dear Alice of Stars,**

**Remember when I said I'd get this up like, right before midnight? Yes, well… I totally meant 4:30 a.m.**

**Yeah. xD **

**I'm so sorry~! T^T**

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><p>Ludwig led Feliciano to the door and opened it, letting his friend inside first so he could close the door. The foyer was dimly lit, like the rest of the house, yet a warm glow emanated from down the hall and beyond the kitchen. Muffled voices traveled through to the foyer, where the two stood, trying to figure out who was in the house with them. The first voice sounded deep and loud, and paused for the next voice, which was much higher and softer. Neither sounded like Gilbert…<p>

Ludwig motioned for Feliciano to follow him. They snuck down the hall, towards the light. The kitchen door was ajar and so was the fridge. Ludwig walked in briefly to shut it and then continue walking. Passed the kitchen was the living room, which was large and spacious. _Gilbert should feel lucky that mom and dad had enough money to afford a place like this for him_, Ludwig thought. The voices became clear when they entered the room.

Feliciano and Ludwig were greeted by a hearty, "You're a wizard, Harry!" coming from the television.

And there was Gilbert, clad in baby blue boxers and a tight tee-shirt, slumped on the leather couch and eating ice cream out of the tub. Ludwig sighed and walked over to the couch while Feliciano followed.

"I'm…a what?" the TV shouted. Gilbert had the volume up much too high.

"Gilbert, why is it so loud?" Ludwig said over the TV, or he tried to, at least.

"If it's too loud then you're too old." Gilbert responded and shoved a spoonful of vanilla ice cream into his mouth. He further slumped down the couch and looked over at Feliciano. "Why's he here?"

"Why are you in a bad mood? Anyway, he has to spend the night because of some…unfavorable circumstances." Ludwig sat on the couch and his friend shuffled over to sit next to him.

"I'm not in a bad mood; I'm just trying to relax. Damn."

"Ve, Mr. Gilbert, what're you watching?" he asked a little too quietly. He stared at the screen with a puzzled expression. Gilbert paused the movie immediately and leaned over his brother to stare at the Italian.

"What the hell, can't you tell?" he asked and fiddled with the controls to zoom in on one of the boys on the screen. "It's fucking Harry Potter, look at his face."

"Oh, uh…ve, I've never seen it…" Feliciano replied.

Gilbert's eye twitched.

Before something disastrous happened, Ludwig pulled Gilbert away from Feliciano and suggested they go upstairs. His brother obviously had some kind of unresolved issue, and Ludwig didn't want to stick around for when he did resolve it. Feliciano agreed and followed Ludwig up the stairs and into his room. Feliciano hopped on his bed and scooted over when Ludwig did the same. The German boy noticed that Feli's hair had grown curlier since getting wet. It wasn't extremely curly, but flipped up at the ends and in silly places, much like Antonio's hair. It looked nice and made that strange outward curl look slightly more fitting.

Feliciano smiled at him with sleepy eyes. "Your room smells like cologne."

"Oh…um, thanks." He said and leaned back on his elbows.

"Hey, Ludwig?"

"What?"

"Do you mind if I take a shower? My hair feels gross." Feli gave a sheepish smile and ruffled his own hair.

Ludwig's face heated, much to his dismay. "O-oh, sure. It's across the hall, the first door on the right."

"Okay~! Thanks!" Feliciano bounced up off the bed and skipped out the door. Ludwig buried his face in his bed sheets, faintly smelling his own cologne in them. Well, that was new.

He stayed for a moment. His face gradually cooled down and the sheets became warm, making it a little uncomfortable. He heard his own name being called from the bathroom, so he reluctantly pushed off the bed and followed the sound. The door was already open, revealing Feli bending over the side of the tub and trying to turn the faucet on. He looked over with a sad face.

"It doesn't work! The water doesn't come on when I twist the thingy!" he cried and furiously twisted the handle of the bath faucet.

"Whoa, don't do that! You have to pull it up and then twist it." Ludwig said and leaned over as well, shooing Feli's hands away to do it himself.

"Ohhh. Thanks!" he smiled and put a hand under the heavy stream.

"Yeah. Just holler if you need anything." Ludwig said while leaving the room.

As soon as he closed the bathroom door, the blond leaned against the wall and pressed a hand to his forehead. Something was seriously wrong. His face felt hot and his heart was racing, and it always occurred when he came into contact with Feliciano.

…Feliciano…

He couldn't possibly have feelings for the Italian. …Could he?

As soon as his heart calmed, Ludwig trudged down the stairs to find his brother. Gilbert could tell him why he was feeling so strange.

Gilbert was in the same position as before, only he had slid even _further _down the couch and his neck was bent at a strange angle. His shirt had risen up passed his chest and bunched at his chin. His crimson eyes were glazed over and a dab of vanilla ice cream smeared the corner of his mouth.

"Gil? You okay?" Ludwig asked from afar. Gilbert's eyes flicked from the TV to his brother and back at the screen. He shrugged.

Ludwig walked over cautiously and then sat beside him. "I can tell something's wrong."

Gilbert sighed and sat up, pulling his shirt down over his cool stomach. "Well yeah, something's fucking wrong. Elizaveta's engaged to that fucking prick now and they're gonna get married and have tons of beautiful aristocratic babies who can play the piano!"

Ludwig blinked. "So you _do_ like her?"

"Why are you so fucking dense? Of course I like her! I'm pretty sure I _love _her!" Gilbert yelled. He looked like he was about to cry. "But now I can't have her. Because she loves someone else…"

"…Gilbert, if you really love her, then you should be happy for her. She's found someone who makes her happy, and as long as she's happy, then you should be, too."

"That's a fucking stupid answer. Like hell I'm happy for her. That douche Roderich doesn't deserve her."

"Have you even talked to him before?" Ludwig inquired, leaning back on his hand that was perched on the top of the couch.

"Yeah. …Well, not really. I was getting the mail once and he shouted 'watch the lilacs' at me. What the hell does that even mean?"

Ludwig closed his eyes and let out a frustrated breath. "Gilbert, if I'm the dense one, then you must be a pile of bricks. We planted lilacs by the mailbox a while ago. They must've been growing that day and he wanted to be sure that you wouldn't step on them."

Gilbert's anger subsided quickly, his eyes growing a bit wide. "Oh. Oh, well that was nice of him."

"…so you didn't like him because he gave you a warning about the flowers?"

"Well I didn't get it! I didn't know what he meant! I guess he's an alright guy if he wasn't trying to insult me or whatever."

"So stop calling him a douche. I'm getting sick of hearing that."

"Oh, well, excuuuuse me, princess." Gilbert sneered and leaned back on the couch.

Ludwig then remembered why he had even gone downstairs. He suddenly felt nervous and his heart thumped loudly. "Um…Gilbert, I've been meaning to talk to you about something…"

"Yeah? Well go ahead, the almighty Gilbo is listening."

"Okay… well…I've been feeling really weird lately." Gilbert's head perked up. "And I'm not sure why. I start feeling really hot-"

"Well that's natural. If you're related to me, then you've got to be pretty damn attractive."

"Shut up, I'm talking! Anyway, I start feeling really _warm, _and my heart beats fast. My chest gets tight, I get nervous for no reason and I feel sick all at the same time."

A slow smile started growing on Gilbert's face as he listened.

"…and it only happens when I'm around Feliciano."

Gilbert's smirk faltered for just a moment. "What?"

"I…I don't know, maybe I'm just going insane…"

"No, no, you aren't insane. Wait, haven't you been in love before?"

"…no…not _in _love."

"Well you are now, buddy." Gilbert flashed a smile and turned the volume up on the TV, as if it wasn't loud enough already.

"…what?" Ludwig asked, feeling his heart beat even faster.

"You're in love with Feliciano. Which is fine by me, because then Antonio gets to be my brother-in-law."

"That's ridiculous!"

Gilbert was about to make a stupid retort when a sudden scream from upstairs interrupted him.

"Hey, go get your man." The older said and switched the channel.

Ludwig glared at Gilbert before rushing upstairs. He opened the door to the bathroom and a sudden rush of steam billowed around him. He winced at the moist cloud of heat and spotted Feli standing on top of the toilet seat, clinging to a towel he was using to cover himself. Ludwig looked around the room but didn't see any sort of threat to his safety.

"What's wrong? What happened?" He asked, stepping closer to the other.

"Ve! T-there's a sp-spider in the shower!" Feli yelled and shook.

Ludwig sighed, frustrated, and started looking for the spider. He found the tiny little thing sitting in the corner, as terrified as Feli, and picked it up with a square of toilet paper. He threw the paper in the trash and helped Feliciano off his perch.

"Better?"

"Yes! Grazie! You saved my life!" he hugged Ludwig tightly, making the German's shirt wet and cold. Ludwig coughed awkwardly and Feli let go.

"I'll be going, then."

"No! Wait!" Feli said and gripped his wrist. Ludwig turned, startled.

"Um…can you stay in here with me? I mean, not in the _shower, _but on the floor or something? Because…another spider might come and attack me! Or, or the faucet could stop working and scorch me! Or I could drop the razor and cut open my thigh!"

"…what? Why would you even shave in the shower?"

Feli's face turned remarkably red. "Oh…oh, no reason. J-just a possibility."

"Uh, yeah I guess." Ludwig replied, finally. He took a seat on the recently stood on toilet and closed his eyes when Feli told him to. Once he was in the shower again, Ludwig opened his eyes and yawned. The running water was soothing, along with Feli humming some unfamiliar tune. It must've been late…it was pitch dark outside the last time he had looked.

He peered over at the wall and noticed little drips of glistening water falling down. He stood and reached over the counter and sink, flipping a switch on the wall to turn on the vent. It started up and buzzed loudly, causing Feli to yelp and drop something, then peek his head out through the curtain.

"What was that?" he asked, eyes wide.

"I turned the vent on."

"…why? It's scary sounding!"

"Well, you see that water on the wall?" He pointed at the wall next to him. Feli nodded a little too enthusiastically. "Well, that's from the condensation. It weakens the paint and makes it chip and peel. That's why I turned the vent on."

"Ohh!" And Feli resumed his shower like normal.

There wasn't much talk after that. They returned to Ludwig's room, where the German let Feli borrow one of his shirts (which was a bit too large for him) and a pair of shorts. Feli was tired as much as Ludwig was, so they both decided it was time for sleep. After convincing Gilbert to turn off the extremely loud television, they climbed into Ludwig's bed. They needed to share because Gilbert didn't have a blow up mattress anywhere and Ludwig didn't want him to sleep on the floor.

Feli fell asleep instantly, but Ludwig was having trouble getting his eyes closed.

Feliciano flipped abruptly, and was pressed against Ludwig, creating a heat between the two of them that nearly made the German kick off the covers. He wiggled a little, pressing backward even more, curling slightly into himself and made his back tight against Ludwig's stomach.

The blond one sucked in a breath and held it, suppressing the urge to actually kick the Italian out of his bed. Never before had he needed to share a bed with anyone, including Gilbert, and this experience was proving to be a challenging one.

"Feli...Feli, move over a little…" he said softly. Feliciano straightened a bit, moving away from the other just a tad.

Ludwig, feeling accomplished, closed his eyes and tried to let the darkness seep in. However, Feliciano flipped again, curling into Ludwig this time. The German took in another large breath through his nose, but not because of the heat. One of Feliciano's legs had brushed against his own and dragged on upward; his bony knee trailing up his thigh and pressed into his hip. …Unintentionally, of course.

Ludwig respired shakily, fully aware of how close his friend really was. Feliciano wriggled a little, softly speaking nonsensical words, and then grabbed a part of Ludwig's tank top. It bunched in his fist as his head drew closer, his forehead touching just under Ludwig's ribcage. He shuddered and whimpered, like he was having a bad dream. Ludwig felt his heart sink. If Feliciano was having a nightmare, then he should wake him up, right?

But he couldn't find it in his heard to shake the Italian awake. Instead, he shimmied downward and brought his pillow with him, so he could be face to face with Feli. Indeed, he was having a bad dream, as his face was scrunched up with distress and he puffed little breaths of anguish. Ludwig put and arm around him and coaxed the other's back to straighten. Feliciano moved closer and draped an arm over Ludwig's side, fitting his head conveniently under the German's chin. He heard Feliciano sigh in content.

Ludwig felt his eyelids grow heavy while watching the moon out the window. Dark clouds were illuminated when they passed by the glowing orb, softening its bright gaze if only for a moment. The crickets and frogs were having a fierce chirping battle outside. Just as Ludwig closed his eyes, Feli started to quiver again.

The German boy's blush kicked in when a certain idea passed his mind. He raised a hand to gently stroke the Italian's hair, pulling the somewhat damp locks away from his softly sleeping face and behind his ear. That seemed to calm him a bit, as he squeezed Ludwig in a mini hug. The blond smiled softly. He repeated the action several times, succeeding in soothing the other boy. With every stroke, a whiff of his shampoo wafted towards Ludwig.

Feliciano had used Ludwig's shampoo.

That thought alone was enough to make his heart warm and his face flare up. Something came over him, a sudden urge that he couldn't help. Ludwig tilted his head downward, towards Feliciano's head, and gently pressed his lips to his soft hair. And he hadn't realized, but he stayed there, kissing the other's hair for a long, long time.

Feliciano softly woke from his sleep at the feeling of sudden warmness on his head, along with warm puffs of air blowing against his scalp. He realized he was very, very close to Ludwig at the moment, and felt like he was about to explode. Ludwig must be the one breathing into his hair at the moment...

But it wasn't him just breathing, was it? There was also a certain heat just below where his breathing was coming from…

Oh.

Feli's cheeks warmed and his chest grew tight, painfully tight. Ludwig was _kissing _him, technically. What was he supposed to do…?

He did what he thought was right, but was mostly out of sudden action.

Feliciano pulled his head away, quickly enough to hear Ludwig's breathing stop, and then moved upward. He quietly and softly kissed the other's lips, just enough to get a feel, and rolled over.

Ludwig swallowed. _…what just happened?_

He was blushing madly and the pulsing in his hears dominated his hearing. Ludwig stared out the window with a blank mind and concentrated on the small tingling feeling on his mouth.

He _had _to say something.

"Feliciano…?" he whispered to the curled up person next to him.

Feli was shaking. "Huh?" the Italian tried, his voice shaking.

Was he crying…?

"Feliciano…can we talk for a second? About what just happened?"

"No." Feli sat up. "No, because I know what you're about to say. I'm sorry, I really am. I'll leave now and you don't have to ever talk to me again, because I'm a disgusting, sick person and-"

"Feliciano!" Ludwig said forcefully. Feli paused in his speech and turned to look at him. "Feli, it's okay. It's fine."

Ludwig released himself from the covers to scoot closer to the other. "It's really okay. I don't think you're sick or disgusting at all."

"But I am! B-because I kissed you, and we're both boys, and it's wrong, and-"

"It's _fine. _Really, it is." He said. His heart was fluttering, thinking he might even get to kiss him again.

"I…I didn't mean to…it just sort of happened, and...I'm sorry…I really didn't mean to." Feliciano blubbered.

Ludwig's heart lost its wings and spiraled downward. "You…it was an accident?"

"Yes! Yes, it was an accident; I don't know what came over me. I'm so sorry."

He felt as if something living in the shadows had gripped him by the scruff of his neck and was dragging him down into the dark. "An…accident…"

"…yeah."

"Oh…oh, well, then…let's just go to sleep, okay?"

"Yeah, okay." Feliciano agreed and huddled under the covers.

Ludwig didn't sleep at all that night.

Feli went home the next morning after breakfast. Nothing was awkward or unusual between them. Ludwig had already accepted the fact that Feliciano didn't want to be anything more than friends with him, and he was going to have to live with that.

Feliciano, however, was regretting everything he had denied. He did like Ludwig, in _that _way, but he was too afraid to tell him. The fact that he was gay was usually enough to make anyone want to avoid him. If he told Ludwig he had feelings for him, and Ludwig didn't feel the same, would he be disgusted like everyone else? Would he snub Feli and pretend he didn't exist? …but he had said it was okay, hadn't he?

Wasn't that enough?

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><p><strong>Ughhh, I'm so sorry, guise. I was going to include their first day back at school, but that'll have to wait 'til next chapter. I'm way too tired to even focus on what I'm typingsdfknvajfbnIAEJNBlsnb. <strong>

**Okay, so the part where they're all, "oh fuck, we just kissed 'accidentally'…" I totally had that written differently…like, in a way that probably would've changed how this entire fic turned out. It was a lot happier, too….**

**But I'm glad that I changed it, because now there's MORE DRAMA OMG. And it's less rushed now~**

**By the way, I'm totes thinking about drawing Feli's sexy curly hair. X3 ...or Gilbert slumped down on the couch with his shirt up. lol.**

**** Hey guys! I totes drew Gilbert in his depression mode: **fav. me/ d41n8l3 ****(remove the spaces, hurr) :D****

**...Alright, it's sleepytime for Cassidy.**


	9. Chapter 9

**This was so hard to write. So very hard. Writer's block is a horrible, horrible thing. Anyway, everything about their school is taken from the high school in my town, since I've never lived in any other town or state, let alone switched schools.**

**I'd really like to thank GermanyChick for helping me with this chapter! She gave me some wonderful ideas and helped with some character roles! Thank you very much, miss! I greatly appreciate it since this would be so very boring otherwise! :D  
><strong>

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><p>After Feliciano had gone, Ludwig had nearly collapsed on the kitchen counter, feeling a bit depressed and possibly wanting to take a swig of the melted ice cream that Gilbert forgot to put away the night before.<p>

When Gilbert waltzed in the kitchen door announcing what an awesome night of sleep he had, Ludwig groaned and rubbed at his tired eyes. The fleshy skin of his lower lids was a faint purplish color due to sleep loss, and Gilbert's exaggerated stretching and sighing was not helping him forget about it.

The older boy stood on the other side of the island counter and leaned on it, smiling devilishly at Ludwig. "Why are you so tired?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"…does that mean you didn't get laid? That's a shame; I had earplugs ready and everything." He frowned and poked his brother in the forehead.

"For the love of god, Gilbert, can't you get your sick and twisted mind out of the gutter for one damn minute?"

"Whoa, okay, let's calm it down there, Ludi. What's the problem?"

"I said I don't want to talk about it." Ludwig grumbled into the counter. His arms hung limply at his sides while he bent at an awkward angle against the island.

"C'mon. If you don't talk about it then you're gonna keep it bottled inside. And if you knew anything about soda bottles, you'd know they tend to blow up if you shake them up a bit. Remember the last time you didn't tell anyone what was going on?" Gilbert straightened and crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes," Ludwig sighed, "I remember. But I don't intend on throwing desks and choking classmates this time, I promise."

"Good. 'Cause then I'll have to ship you back to mom and dad's, and then I'll be all lonely again."

Ludwig sighed. "…well, see, I _would _tell you what happened, but…it's just…it's just that-"

"It's just that you like boys and I don't and that makes it weird, right?" Gilbert rummaged around in the cabinets for some coffee.

"…well _yeah, _but…I don't know, it's just hard to talk about…"

"Pfft," Gilbert snorted and popped open the coffee can. "believe me, I've heard worse than whatever you're about to say. Just spit it out or quit your crocodile tears, you pussy."

"Fine! Feliciano kissed me last night and I liked it! A lot! But he said it was an accident and now I'm hurt and angry and depressed and I…I just don't know what to do, okay?" Ludwig shouted, covering his head after his outburst.

Gilbert only shrugged and put a few spoonfuls of the ground coffee into the filter. "It could be worse."

"Yeah, I know it could fucking be worse, okay? But thinking about how horrible it _could _be isn't going to help me fix it."

"Mm…well…I'd say just act natural."

"I don't even know what natural is anymore." If Ludwig hunched down any further, he would be a mass of heavily saddened teenage boy upon the nice, clean floor.

"Oh. Well…don't bring up your little kiss in conversation, okay? That's gonna make it awkward. If it really was an accident, then you should probably just forget about it and try to carry on like normal. _That's _what natural is." Gilbert pointed the spoon at Ludwig and accidentally whipped some ground coffee in his direction. Ludwig glared at him. "Um…sorry. Anyway, just because it was an accident doesn't mean there can't be a real one later. You just gotta charm him, you know? Which should be easy enough…I mean, look at you. You're gorgeous. Sexy, even."

"Oh, well thank you, Gilbert. I feel so much better knowing that my brother thinks I'm sexy."

"Hey, it's no biggie. Now help me figure out how to use this goddamn coffee maker."

Nothing particularly interesting happened for the rest of the week. Feliciano seemed to avoid going outside when Ludwig was, though they would talk on the phone as if nothing strange had happened at all. And Ludwig wasn't sure if he should be happy about that or not.

The following Monday was the first day of school. From what Feliciano had told him, he was only supposed to bring his schedule and a notebook. He'd only need those things to get around and write down the supplies he needed. Apparently that's what everyone did on the first day.

Gilbert had offered to drive him, which he did, and, once they had arrived, proceeded to ask (rather loudly) if Ludwig had remembered his My Little Pony lunchbox. The younger reached into the car window and punched his brother in the stomach, then turned and waved goodbye.

Upon entering the building, Ludwig looked around and tried to breathe steadily. He entered into a large room, which was decorated with unused TVs settled in the corners and benches marked with the school colors. Students were standing in pairs or groups all around, soon clumping together like farm animals in a barn. He hadn't been standing there for even five minutes before two girls approached him.

"Hey there," a girl with soft, loose, brunette curls atop her head sauntered over to him. "Are you new here?"

"He's so big and strong~!" the other, a thin blonde donning a rather revealing shirt, looked him up and down.

"Um...thanks?" Ludwig mumbled and shifted his attention between the two girls. Both were making the same face at him: their eyes half lidded with mock admiration and their bottom lips repeatedly being bitten. The two wiggled around almost as if they were dancing, though he knew they were just trying to be cute.

"Oooh! Did you hear his accent? He's totally foreign!" the blonde giggled and looked at her friend.

"I bet he's from France~!"

"No way! He's totally Swedish!"

"Like Berwald!" they both squealed quietly in sync. Suddenly, the brunette perked up and turned towards Ludwig.

"DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?" she asked loudly, her eyes wide while she nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes. I'm fluent, thank you." Ludwig said while nodding lightly, mocking her. She didn't notice.

"Do you know Berwald? You're both from Sweden, after all!" the blonde chimed in and flipped her layered hair over her shoulder.

"I have no clue who Berwald is and I'm not Swedish."

"Oh! You're Finnish, then?"

"Obviously not, he's still talking to us." the blonde girl snorted.

"You ditz, I said _Finnish_not finished."

"Oh, he's Finnish? Wow, just like Timo!" And another duet of squeals commenced. "Oh, wait, what if he's from Switzerland?"

"No, I don't think so. But then again, I've never heard anyone speak Swiss before..."

Suddenly, someone's warm arms curled around his left bicep in a protective manner.

"His name is Ludwig and he's from Germany." The person explained in a firm (but cheerful) Italian accent.

"Oh, he is?" the brunette's smile faltered slightly, as if the news displeased her.

"Oh my God, his name is Ludwig?" the blonde smiled in disbelief. "Like Mozart?"

The girls laughed for a moment and quickly regained whatever dignity they had before.

Ludwig was still slightly in shock at the fact that Feliciano had even approached him. In a panic, he wrenched his arm from Feli's grasp and stared at him, debating whether to follow Gilbert's advice and "act natural" or run away.

For once, he chose the idiot move and ran.

He bolted away like a scared rabbit and left Feli (and the two girls) standing there, speechless. It surely wasn't a good first impression but he wasn't concerned with it at the time. He darted to the left and around a group of goth kids who watched him with blank expressions. Ludwig looked behind him for a split second to check if anyone was following him, but he failed to see the stairs ahead. The sudden loss of balance caused him to whip his head forward and yelp. He held his hands out in front of him, awaiting the impact, but was nearly choked instead. Someone pulled on the back of his jacket and yanked him upright, exclaiming loudly.

"Watch it there, buddy! You almost cracked your face in half!" an uncomfortably loud voice shouted at him. He was turned around suddenly by this person, and was awkwardly surprised to see him smiling like an idiot. The boy was blond, verging on brunet, and a single strand stuck out from the part in his hair, like it had a mind of its own.

"I bet I just saved your life! Wow, I'm a hero! Aren't I such an amazing hero, Artie?" he beamed and looked at a boy behind him.

"I told you not to call me that. And you're probably the worst hero the world has ever seen." The other, another blond with (astonishingly) thick eyebrows retorted. He frowned.

"No, the worst is Aquaman. Anyway! Why were you speedin' around like the roadrunner, Mr. Macho?"

Ludwig tilted his head a little, still a bit shocked and confused. "I…I was just…getting away, er…running from…uh…" he pointed in random directions, as if it would help his explanation. Suddenly, he was released from the other's grasp.

"Never mind, I don't care anymore. My name's Alfred and this is Artie, my BFF."

"Screw you, we aren't friends! And my name is _Arthur, _damn it!"

"Don't pretend like you don't love that name. And we _are so_ friends; we've known each other since preschool!"

"That's why I regret going to preschool!"

Ludwig, figuring these two would bicker about nothing forever, silently walked away and pulled out his schedule. It'd be best if he went on to his homeroom, if he could find it. The room number was 215. Lucky for him, it was just down the hall.

The room was mostly empty and lacking a teacher in it, to Ludwig's surprise. A few other students were huddled together and talking. He silently walked to the back of the room where three desks were lazily lined up and shimmied into one of the desks, setting his notebook on the top. The door opened and a familiar voice echoed through the room, one he had just heard moments ago.

"Oh hey, it's Mr. Macho!" Alfred said and dragged Arthur with him to the back of the room. He sat in a desk and scooted it closer to Ludwig, then patted the seat next to him so Arthur could sit.

"I must've missed your name earlier, roadrunner. Artie here was talking my ear off back there."

"I was not! Quit lying to people you don't even know!" Arthur huffed.

"Oh, my name is Ludwig." He blinked.

"Well Ludwig, are you new here?"

"Yeah, kinda."

"So is Artie. He even told me this morning how scared he was about coming here."

"What the heck! I've been here for years!"

"But you keep ditching me to go on trips to England! You've never once invited me to come with you!"

"Because my brothers live there! And I already told you, _I don't like you!"_

"Liar. Anyway, what class do you have next, Lud?"

"Lud…? Um, I have P.E."

"So do me and Artie! Who's your teacher?"

"Um…some guy named Kar…Karpusi?"

"Oh, I have him, too! I had him last year, also. Every single day he'd just fall asleep after taking attendance, so we all just kinda sat and talked. Actually, I'm a little surprised he hasn't been fired yet because of that…"

Ludwig blinked as the bell rang and he was dragged by Alfred out of the room. The halls were crowded with people trying to shove their way to their next class and people who didn't care to go anywhere at all. Ludwig was led down the stairs to the gym, which was in the basement of the school. A few people were already seated against the folded bleachers, currently napping or talking with each other.

The gym teacher was standing over by the wrestling mats, looking indifferent as he scribbled something onto his clipboard. Something was very familiar about him…

"…I think that guy rang me up at the grocery store once." Ludwig said, to no one in particular.

"Hm? Oh, yeah. Mr. Karpusi works at the store during the summery months. Like a part-time job, I guess." Alfred yawned.

The three of them sat down against the bleachers and watched more people trudge into the gym.

"So…what do we do here, exactly? I mean, they wouldn't make us run or anything on the first day, right?" Ludwig asked.

"Oh! See, Mr. Teacher-man gives us our locker room information, and then we go check that our lockers work. And then we come back here and wait until our next class." Alfred waved at someone across the room who apparently didn't see him.

And as soon as he'd said it, Mr. Karpusi started going down the line of people and handing them little slips of paper. He looked really tired and about to nod off any second. He practically tossed the little piece of paper at people after a while.

Ludwig froze when he saw a particular Italian enter the room, chatting away at a short, blond boy. _Why is everybody blond? _A strange feeling welled up inside him, something like anger or betrayal. But Feliciano wasn't his, and certainly didn't want to be, right? He was already onto someone else.

"Whoa, hey, you okay? You got wicked tense, there." Alfred touched his arm and made him jump.

"Oh…yeah…"

"You sure? You're staring at nothing like there's a demon ghost or something."

"No, it's just…someone is here that I'd rather avoid…"

"Huh? Who?" Alfred knocked his head against Ludwig's to try and mimic his line of sight. "Ohhh. Feliciano, huh? I don't blame you for avoiding him."

"What? Why?"

"He's a fag. You can't hang out with fags, it's bad for your rep. Plus, he's annoying." Alfred gave a half-smile, but Ludwig only frowned.

He wanted to say so many things to Alfred right then and there, _so many things…_but he couldn't bring himself to do it. His mouth wouldn't move no matter how hard he thought about it.

"That's ridiculous. I've met him before; he's not all that horrible. And I don't see why hanging out with him would be bad at all." Arthur scoffed and crossed his arms. "You shouldn't go around saying things like that. You could hurt someone."

"Gee, sorry, _mom. _Didn't know you were one, too."

"I'm not gay, you prick. You're just an ass."

A pokey shadow loomed over them for a moment and Mr. Karpusi handed them their slips. He then sniffed and moved down the line, motioning for them to leave the gym.

"Oooh, what's your locker number, Artie?"

"27. And _please, _for the love of scones, _stop calling me that!"_

"Oh, hey, I've got 29! We'll be locker buddies! Again!"

"God damnit."

"What about you, Lud? What've you got?"

"Um…" Ludwig flipped the paper, trying to figure out the scrawled handwriting. "…15, I think…?"

"Awh, you're on the other side of the room! Darn. We could've been the locker buddy trio or something."

"Not on your life, wanker." Arthur snickered.

The locker room was directly across the hall from the gym's nearest exit. It felt more like a chamber than a locker room, as the doorways were arched and made of old brick. The lockers were a glossy red color, completely unlike the rest of the school's bland paint job. The room attendant was clearly passed out on his desk, sleeping. _What's wrong with these people?_

The boys filed into the room and shuffled to their assigned lockers, and most started to fiddle with the dials as others decided not to bother at all with their combinations. Ludwig's locker was on the right wall towards the corner. He had just touched the dial when a loud greeting was projected in his direction.

"Ciaoooo, Ludwig!" Feliciano chirped and sat on the edge of the wooden bench placed just under the last row of lockers. The blond boy took a seat next to him and smiled. Ludwig's eye twitched and he turned around to face him.

"Oh, ah, hello." He said simply, and then went back to work.

"You ran away earlier and I didn't get to introduce you to all my friends!" Feli pouted at him. Ludwig just sighed and apologized half-heartedly.

"This is Timo. I've known him for a really long time so I thought I might as well make him meet you!" Timo, the blond boy, smiled at him and held out his hand for Ludwig to shake. Ludwig took it, and was puzzled for a moment as to whether Timo's hands were really small or his hands were just really big.

"You remember how those girls were all, 'oh, hey, maybe knows Berwald'? Well, Berwald is Timo's best friend ever!" Feliciano smiled brightly as if it were the happiest thing he'd ever heard. Timo was smiling just as bright. Ludwig was a little scared; those two could've been long lost twins.

"Oh, well that's…um, good?" Ludwig tried, and after seeing Feli was content with that answer, he went back to the business of his locker.

"Alright, everybody go back to the gym! I'm sick of looking at all of you already!" the attendant grumbled. Apparently he'd been rudely awakened from his nap.

And so, all the boys filed out of the room again and back into the gym, where Mr. Karpusi was napping on the wrestling mats and kids decided to either join him or sit and talk. When the bell rang, everyone jumped up (aside from Mr. Karpusi, of course, whose nose only twitched at the sound) and trudged towards the door.

Ludwig's next class was biology, something he could stand but wasn't exactly interested in. The science room was practically full when he entered, and was forced to sit next to a giant with a scarf. _Who the hell wears a scarf in summer? _He was friendly though, for the most part, and introduced himself as Ivan Braginski. He also took the liberty of pointing out a few other students to him, including a small boy named Raivis, an Asian kid named Yao, and a cross dresser named Feliks. _Everyone here is a misfit. What the hell._

Afterwards, he struggled to find the history classroom, and mentally facepalmed when he realized it was right next to the science room. _Goddamn lousy room numbers. _The history room was bright and full of random maps and charts, along with an off-colored globe here and there. Nothing he hadn't seen before. The teacher, a man whose name Ludwig couldn't pronounce (it sounded Middle-Eastern), was sitting behind the desk and sort of staring at the door, not saying a word. He was wearing a strange sort of headdress, like someone living in the desert would wear. And as far as he knew, they weren't living anywhere near a desert. Ludwig looked at him, expecting at least a hello, but instead received a curt nod towards a desk to the left.

Absolutely nothing happened in the entire class period. Their teacher did not say a word and the students were left to do nothing but sit and talk. Ludwig sat awkwardly by himself, seeing as he was something of an introvert and none of his new friends were in this class. He took a look around at the students, who were all looking tired and unhappy. He did notice, however, one person who was staring at him with a strange glare. He blinked at the other boy (who had tanned skin and a bit of stubble lining his jaw) and tried to ignore his gaze by opening his notebook and pretending to write.

He absently shaded in the margin of the first page, then traced all the lines, and peeked up from his work. Sure enough, the other was still watching with an unpleasant gaze. Ludwig looked away awkwardly and thanked the stars that the bell had rung.

Feli had met up with him (much to Ludwig's dismay) in the hall and followed him to the lunchroom, where the Italian pulled on his arm and said, "Ve, come sit with me and Kiku, Ludwig!"

So he did.

Kiku was seated by himself at the end of an empty table, carefully snapping a pair of wooden chopsticks apart. He looked just a tiny bit happier once the other two joined him, though the table remained empty. Ludwig figured they must've been outcasts or something. _Great._

Feliciano sat next to Kiku and blabbered on about nothing interesting, except how girls kept walking by him and giggling for no reason. Kiku nodded as if he were listening but it was obvious to anyone who watched that he was only concerned with finishing his own meal.

Ludwig dented the top of his pile of mashed potatoes (what a disgrace, they weren't even real potatoes) with the back of his spoon. A sudden noise from across the room made him turn and look. It was that one kid from his History class. He was smirking devilishly and making weird hand signals that Ludwig didn't quite understand. The other boys who sat with him snickered a bit, making the same movements. He peered around the room subtly and noticed that pretty much the entire cafeteria was staring at him. The female portion, anyway. What the hell, was he _really_ that interesting?

"Ludi? Are you okay?" Feliciano asked, noticing Ludwig's rather startled expression.

"Uh...why is everyone staring at me?"

"Hm?" Feli took a look around and noticed too. A bit of fiery jealousy coursed through him for a split second.

"It's just because you're new." Kiku explained. Feliciano shook his head.

"The girls think you're hot!" he smiled, a false grin, however.

"Oh..."

"Haha, wow, you might even get a cute girlfriend on the first day! Lucky you!" Feli clenched his teeth unknowingly.

"...I don't think that's going to happen. And what's with them over there?" Ludwig gestured to the tan boy and his group of buddies. He noticed Feli's expression turn dark and worrisome.

"Oh. That's Sadiq Annan and his buddies. Just...promise me you won't be friends with them, okay? They're really mean to us."

"…Okay. What are they even doing? I mean, those gestures..."

Feli's face turned a dull red and he looked at his lap. Kiku chuckled quietly and picked at his rice. "They are implying that you like to-"

"Kiku, don't. Let's not taint his innocence." Feli waved his hands in front of Kiku, who shrugged goodheartedly.

Ludwig looked back at Sadiq, who was now making a V with his fingers and flicking his tongue between the space. _Oh Jesus._

After lunch was Ludwig's random AP class: Lit. and Comp. He had never exactly considered himself a gifted writer, but he'd take the credits anyway. As soon as he'd walked into the room he decided it was going to be his favorite class. Everyone inside was bubbly and happy and laughing with each other; the windows were open and a soft, warm breeze drifted in and rustled notebook papers. He took a seat near the front.

A man with dark hair (a strange, single strand curling outward, like Alfred's) and an elegant aura about him strode in, announcing that class was beginning and all shenanigans should cease for the next 45 minutes. He spoke in an accent that made Ludwig smile, as he recognized it as his own. He could get used to it. The man took a look around the room and paused strangely when he came upon Ludwig.

"You," he stepped closer. "What's your name?"

"…Ludwig Beilschmidt."

"I see. Is your idiot brother still stomping on those poor, innocent flowers like a barbarian?"

"Um…not to my knowledge."

"Good. That man is so crude and ill-mannered , I can't see how you can live with him."

"It's a chore, I'll give you that."

"Oh, it's a chore alright…" and with that, this Roderich (as Ludwig had assumed he was, and he currently was not aware of his surname) had gone on a rant about how awful Gilbert was, while the students either listened to be entertained or talked amongst themselves. He hadn't finished his rant by the time the bell rung, but Ludwig's blush wasn't complaining otherwise.

Math class was next. He found a lot of familiar faces there, starting with a dreamy-looking Feliciano in the very front. He took a seat next to the Italian, still a little uneasy of his presence. But he figured Feli would get sad if they didn't sit together. Once he sat, his friend snapped out of his daze. He then proceeded to point out all the people he knew in the room (not that Ludwig had asked), which happened to be a lot. First, there were Lilli and Vash, who were siblings (though Vash was a year older, since he had been held back in an earlier grade) from Switzerland. Berwald was sitting in the back, next to Timo. Four boys sat in a row on the right, only two of which he recognized as Raivis and Ivan. Feliciano said the other two were named Eduard and Toris. Their teacher, who had been trying to get the students' attention the whole time, was a lady whom they all called Miss Ukraine, since she hailed from said country. And holy mother of all that is wurst, how could boobs even get that big?

The final bell had rung, and Miss Ukraine had hidden somewhere behind her desk, so the students walked out the door without so much as a goodbye. Ludwig had tried to get away from Feliciano as quickly as possible to avoid the impending embarrassment (though it was silly, wasn't it? He didn't need to hide like that). However, just as he was making his way through the crowd towards the stairs outside, he felt a tug on his jacket sleeve and turned. Feliciano was standing behind him, his eyes averted and a small blush on his cheeks.

"Eh…Ludwig…can I talk to you? Just for a bit?"

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><p><strong>OMG FINALLY. I'm really sorry that it took so long! D:<br>**


	10. Chapter 10

**Had my first day of high school today! Lovely stuff. I couldn't find my sister after school, so I was worried she left without me. T^T Anyway, here you go, guys. Oh, and um…this turned out a little bit darker than expected…. But it's not like, HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THIS.**

**Maybe.**

**I'm sorry. T^T  
><strong>

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><p>Ludwig blinked. "Uh, sure…"<p>

Feliciano dragged him by the arm, leading them outside, down the stairs, and back around the side of the school. The brunet sighed and looked awkwardly at the green spears beneath his worn shoes before turning his eyes to meet the icy blue.

"I…I have two questions for you. And, depending on how you answer the first, I might not even ask you the other one."

"Well that wasn't cryptic whatsoever."

"Lud, really. This is important."

Ludwig scrunched his eyebrows together. Fear and panic was stirring around his insides, making his fingers clench and his face feel cold. Feliciano took a deep breath and reached into his pocket, pulling out a crumpled sheet of loose-leaf paper. Ludwig noticed his hands were shaking a little as he held the tattered half sheet.

"U-um," he started, swallowing silently. "A girl gave me this today. I…don't know if you know her, but apparently she really likes you. And she wants me to a-ask you out…for her…"

"Oh…" was all Ludwig could respond with.

"Yeah…her name is Megan. Do you remember? I pointed her out to you in math."

Ludwig thought for a moment. He couldn't remember him saying anything about a Megan…

"Oh, right. Yeah. Her. I remember."

"So…are you gonna go out with her? I mean…she's really funny and really pretty. She can cook really well and she can paint like no one's business. And she's a little stupid, but I'm sure you can smarten her up." Feliciano gave a sheepish smile that only twisted Ludwig's stomach into knots. He didn't even know this girl, how was he supposed to court her? He'd never even seen her before! Was something like that the norm around here? To date someone you don't even know?

"…I…I don't…think so. I just…" Ludwig let out an unintentionally angry breath that made Feli jump. "I don't even…_know _her…I don't even know if I…"

"…If you…?"

"U-uhm…never mind, it isn't important. I don't want to hurt her feelings, but…I don't want to date her. Sorry, I guess." Ludwig shrugged and tried to look away, but he couldn't bring himself to. Something was still bothering him…something deep down, nagging at him like a gnat; telling him to stay put.

"I see…" Feliciano crumpled the paper quickly, shoving it in his pocket as if he didn't want the other to see it. "…I'll have to ask you the other question, then…"

"Alright." Ludwig said. He slipped his hands into his pockets; the feeling of leaving them hanging at his sides had suddenly become extremely strange. His heart was pounding against his ribs like a tiny drum. Why was he so nervous? It's not like Feliciano was about to whip a gun out of nowhere and shoot him in the face.

"Okay…I'm sorry if it offends you, o-or makes you want to stay away from me, but…are you, by any chance, gay? Maybe?"

That was one hell of a gun.

"W-what?" Ludwig felt numb. This could be his _one_ chance to maybe be something more with Feli. But he had no doubts that he'd screw it up.

"It's just…well, first of all…you just now rejected the offer of having a wonderful girlfriend. Megan is someone that any guy would love to be with. She really is beautiful, and it's a little surprising you don't remember her. And second, that one night that we…you know…you didn't really…find me repulsive. You said it was okay, that it was completely fine. But…any straight guy would be, well, less than accepting of it and willing to forgive me. Much, much less. So…"

Feliciano dug the tip of his shoe into the dirt while waiting for an answer. He made a nice little hole, covered it, and then looked up. He instantly felt horrible when he saw Ludwig's expression. The German looked as if he was about to throw up; his face a sickly pale color.

"Are you okay?" Feliciano tried and moved closer.

Ludwig swallowed and tried to feel anything other than his heart racing and his hands shaking. He'd never thought someone like Feliciano could ask such a straightforward question and expect an immediate answer. Well…Ludwig _knew _the answer, but that didn't mean he wanted to say it right away. Especially not to the person he decided he loved most. _But why not? What is there to lose?_

"I think…" the blond murmured; his voice hoarse and his throat dry even though it had only been a matter of seconds. "I think I am…I mean…"

"Hm?" Feliciano tilted his head. "You're too quiet."

Ludwig closed his eyes for a moment and let the darkness try and get his thoughts in order. "Yes. Yes, I am."

His eyes were still closed. Everything was silent and his heart seemed to stop beating altogether. He felt cold, all around; a bit ashamed to have said it out loud like that. It sounded worse when his voice was attached to the words, rather than the lonely imp in his head.

The ice of his body was melted suddenly by the body heat of another. Feliciano had stepped forward to hug him. He had realized what a truly hard question that was, and how awful of an answer it had felt to Ludwig.

"I came around the side of the school for a reason." He said into the fabric of Ludwig's shirt. "No one comes here. You don't have to cry, Lud."

Had he been crying? Ludwig's arms were pinned, but he could feel a certain wetness to his cheeks; frigid like ice and warm like water.

"I know it's hard," Feliciano continued, "but you've got me here. I'll help you when you need it. And I might need help, too."

Those words weighed down his heart like a balloon tied to a cinderblock. He needed help a lot more than he'd realized. But help from someone who he wanted to avoid and always stand by at the same time wasn't such a great idea after all. He felt a degrading lump in his throat well up, but he was forced to swallow it down. Someone told him long ago that showing sorrow was for the weak.

Feliciano reached up and wiped Ludwig's tears with his shirt sleeve, then smiled. "Everything is going to be okay, alright? You can talk to me about anything, if you ever need someone to listen."

"Thank you," was all Ludwig could muster. His voice was quavering; something he couldn't stand. Feliciano patted his shoulder and reached into his pocket again.

"One more thing," he said, and placed the crumpled piece of paper into Ludwig's hand. "Megan isn't real."

And he walked off, like a complete jerk ass, leaving Ludwig there to try and pick himself up. Ludwig looked down at the paper and unfolded it, pausing momentarily to wipe at his eyes.

The paper was blank.

Ludwig walked home that day, even though he lived so far away from the school. He didn't exactly feel like dicking around with Gilbert anyway. He should feel happy though, right? Feliciano was still his friend. And now that they both were positive the other didn't play for the right team, then they should be set, right? They should be going down the right road to a happily ever after.

But Ludwig didn't feel that way at all.

He felt ashamed, mostly. Dirtied; like he would've preferred that Feliciano didn't ask him at all, so he wouldn't have had to say it out loud. He'd felt like crying the whole way home. But he wasn't weak. He couldn't cry.

Something about the way the TV was relatively quiet really annoyed him. Usually he'd come in and have to yell over it just to say hello to Gilbert. Maybe it was just that he actually wanted to yell today.

He slung his backpack on the floor and tried not to stomp to the living room where his older brother was laying upside down on the leather couch. The television spewed a bright and sunny color, apparently the sky, shining behind the rooftops of what looked to be Italy.

"Assassin's Creed, again?" Ludwig asked, feeling frustrated at the sound of his own voice.

"This game kicks ass. You need to play it." Gilbert drawled. A sudden mistake made him growl and smack the controller against his own hand. "Ezio you dumbass! I didn't tell you to jack that guy's horse, damn it!"

"Oh yeah. Sounds great." Ludwig rolled his eyes and sat behind the island. Something like fury was building inside him. He couldn't tell why he felt so angry anymore. Everything was annoying him all of a sudden, even the way his brother moved his thumbs against the control and camera sticks on the controller. He was beginning to feel scared of himself.

"So how was your day, bud?" the crimson-eyed one asked, pausing his game to sit upright on the couch. His forehead was a silly shade of red that drained quickly to leave his face a pale color.

"Fine." Ludwig responded, the question making his anger burn more.

"Anything amazing happen?"

"No."

"No? Hm. Did you meet any amazing people?"

"…no."

"Ah. Let's see…did you get stuffed in a locker? Oh, you're too big for that, aren't you?"

"Could you just…leave me be for a while? I'm really pissed right now and I just want to be alone." Ludwig started to leave the room.

"Oh, wait! Something bad happened, right? That's why you're mad?" Gilbert sprung from the couch.

"I envy your deduction skills." Ludwig called over his shoulder as he headed for the stairs.

"Ludwig! Tell me what's wrong! I wanna help!"

Ludwig stopped. He was at his boiling point. One more word and he'd definitely do something he would regret. Gilbert watched him curiously.

"Gilbert," he gritted, his teeth grinding painfully. "Leave me the hell alone. I fucking mean it."

The older boy stood rigid. Ludwig was staring at him over his shoulder with one frozen fire of an eye. Neither moved for a while, both still as statues.

"Ludwig," Gilbert started, but Ludwig lunged for him. He grabbed the collar of Gilbert's shirt in both fists and yanked, nearly choking the other.

"Say one more thing and I'll kill you."

Ludwig had a fire in his eyes that made Gilbert believe him. His ruby orbs flickered away from their counterpart and closed. The younger leisurely shoved him onto the floor before stomping up the stairs and slamming his door shut. Gilbert stayed on the floor, lazily covering his eyes with the back of one arm. This hadn't been the first time Ludwig had been that angry.

Ludwig kicked off his shoes and closed the curtain, then shut off the lights; making the room as dark as nighttime. He rolled onto his bed and wrapped himself in the covers, sighing into his pillow. He wasn't tired, but he hoped he could calm down and fall asleep. But his mind kept wandering, thinking about what Feli had said.

_I know it's hard, but you've got me here._

That's right; he still had Feliciano as a friend. And although the thought stung and ached for a more profound meaning, it would have to be good enough for him. It could've been worse, right? He could've lost him, and then he'd be all alone again. All alone and awkward, not having any other friends. That would've been hell.

_I'll help you when you need it._

That was a loyal promise, Ludwig was sure. Nothing could make him doubt the fact that Feli would take any costs to make him feel comfortable and happy.

_And I might need help, too._

…was he willing to help him? Well, of course. It'd be silly to think Ludwig wouldn't try to do the same. But when would Feliciano ever need help? He seemed to carry on fine on his own. …But that's what people thought of Ludwig, and that wasn't necessarily true…

_Everything is going to be okay, alright?_

Was anything even not okay? Everything was fine; whether it was between them or any other people. So far, anyhow. Ludwig wondered briefly if Feli was implying something… like someone or something was going to make everything not okay. Well…there _was _that Sadiq kid. But he didn't seem so bad. ...Maybe he was just overreacting and overanalyzing this. It was _Feliciano, _after all.

…still, maybe he should call him…

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><p><strong>It was... kinda short, sorry.<strong>

**But I am SO excited to write more.** **This is just kinda like, the part where nothing really happens and then BAM everything happens after this.**

**OH MY GOD.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Okay, so I was all HECK YEAH GONNA WORK ON THIS ALL DAY but then I wasted a good 6 hours doing nothing on Deviant Art.**

…**NO REGRETS.**

**And I'd like to give a really big THANK YOU~~~ to everyone who's ever read, reviewed, favorited, or alerted this fic~! It means a lot to me, and I really never expected this to get so much attention! :,D**

**No, this isn't the end if that little thank you suddenly made you think it was. I just wanted to get that out of my system. ^^""**

**Anyhow, enjoy! ...hopefully.  
><strong>

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><p>"Awh! Kiku, why is this so hard?"<p>

"It's not hard. Just use the Great Ball instead of a Pokéball.

"Okay. Hmm...almost there...Oh no! I killed it!"

"Ah. Don't do that. You can come back at a later time and attempt to capture it again."

"…how much later?"

"…after you complete the story mode."

"Ugh! Can we just play Mario instead?"

Feliciano had made his way to Kiku's house after school, like usual. He was feeling a bit giddy after confirming that Ludwig wasn't all that into girls. That was definitely good news. But…it hadn't seemed all that great to Ludwig. Every time he thought of Ludwig's reaction, he felt sick and guilty inside. Maybe he shouldn't have been so…rushed about it. After all, he _had _thought up the entire plan while staring at the back of Ivan's head in study hall…

Kiku moved towards the flat screen TV in his room, reaching for the Wii to change the disc. He carefully put away the small Gamecube disc into its respective case and then popped open the next one. Feliciano stretched out on the floor while he waited. When the title music started and Kiku grabbed a controller, he sat up and sighed rather loudly.

"Oh hey, guess what?"

"Usually when you ask that, it turns out to be something completely irrelevant." Kiku mentioned and pressed a few buttons on his remote. "But I'll play along anyway. What?"

"I found out today that Ludwig is gay, too." Feliciano decided not to play this round. He set his controller on the floor and leaned against Kiku's desk.

"How do you figure that?"

"I asked him. I feel a little bad though, because he looked really sick and sad afterwards."

"It's a touchy subject for a lot of people. Not everyone is so comfortable with themselves like you are."

"Who said I was comfortable with me? But anyway, I was thinking about asking him out."

Kiku's gaze flitted to Feliciano for a moment, a smile barely peeking through his nonchalant expression. "Well, you _are _always talking about him…"

"Yeah, I know." Feli grabbed a pillow off his bed and clutched it to his chest. "I think I love him."

"But you just met him, right?" Kiku shut off his Wii to put in a different game. He had beaten this one already.

"Yes. But don't you believe in love at first sight, Kiku~?" he asked, resting his head on the pillow as he watched the other sift through a cabinet of neatly stacked video games.

The Japanese boy paused, pulled out a case, and stared at the artwork on the cover. "No."

"Pfft. That's so unromantic!"

"It's unrealistic." He replied, taking a seat on his bed. "How do you know it isn't just a crush? Won't you get tired of him after a few months?"

Feliciano watched the screen for a bit, thinking hard for once. "It just…feels different. I've had plenty of crushes and girlfriends that I didn't really like, but…this feels stronger. He's always on my mind; I couldn't forget about him even if I tried. And I love the sound of his voice…it's so deep and manly~!"

"…right. But do you really think _his voice_ is the reason it's love?"

"Ah, why are you so skeptical! Can't you be happy for me for once?"

Kiku paused and looked at him. Feliciano was pouting, half his face covered by the soft pillow. He sighed. "You're right, I'm sorry. Just…please try not to get hurt."

"Oh, just play your game already." Feliciano waved a hand at him and turned back to the screen.

Kiku complied, selecting one of his already 100% completed files and trying to remember what in the world he chose this game for. His thoughts were interrupted when he heard an obnoxious ringing sound, and turned to find Feliciano fishing around in his pockets for his phone. When the Italian found it, he smiled widely at the displayed number and told Kiku to hush (although he wasn't talking in the first place).

"Ciao!"

"_Hi, Feliciano. It's Ludwig."_

"Oh, hi!" He paused for a moment to mouth "_It's Ludwig!" _at Kiku.

"_Um…I know we just talked a little bit ago, but…can you come over? There's something I want to talk to you about."_

"Is something wrong?" Feliciano pulled his legs up to his chest, wrapping one arm around them while the other held his phone.

"_No, no, but… I need to talk to you as soon as possible."_

"Okay. Well, I'm at Kiku's right now, but I'll leave here in a few minutes."

"_That's fine. I'll see you in a bit."_

"Okay~!" Feliciano hung up his phone and tried to shove it back into his pocket. He stood and stretched, then reached for his backpack.

"Are you leaving?" Kiku asked, pausing the game.

"Yeah, sorry. Lud wants to talk to me really soon. Must be pretty important, huh?" he smiled and slung one strap over his shoulder.

"Must be." The other sighed.

"I'll see you tomorrow~! Don't catch that pokémon for me like you did last time, okay? That pisses me off real bad!" Feli opened the door and pointed a finger at him.

"Okay, okay." Kiku rolled his eyes when Feli closed the door.

The clouds had begun to mix and swirl together like batter glazed over with slate gray icing. It was darker near the horizon, where the grayscale sky dipped behind identical roofs and brushstrokes of green tree leaves. Feliciano walked briskly down the sidewalk, staring at the scuffs on his shoes the whole time. Things were whirring around in his mind like a Tilt-A-Whirl; spinning in harsh, pressured circles. He wanted to know what Ludwig wanted to talk about. It really must've been important, if he needed to say it right away, and to his face, even. He could've just said it over the phone…

And before he knew it, he was right in front of Ludwig's door and every coherent thought had vanished. He took a deep breath and rang the doorbell with one twitchy hand. It made a generic _dinggg~ _noise, and then it was silent. He could hear footsteps gradually growing louder as they neared the door. The wooden entrance swung open, revealing a rather disheveled-looking Gilbert. His hair was completely out of order and looked more like a tinsel nest than anything. Feliciano sucked in a breath at the sight of his unusually disordered appearance.

"Um…I'm sorry to bother you, ve…but…is Ludwig home? He wanted to talk to me…"

Gilbert nodded with his eyes closed, then turned to yell for Ludwig. He stayed for a moment, staring at the doorframe and the hardwood flooring until Ludwig came down. He then retreated back into the kitchen like a hermit.

Ludwig tried _so hard _not to panic this time, to not throw up right then and there. Feliciano was looking at him with such a cutely worried face that he just couldn't take it anymore. He _had _to make this adorable boy _his, _right _now. _…if he could just get a grip, first, that is.

Feliciano felt familiar nips at his stomach from the nervous butterflies, just from seeing him. Something yanked at his heart and whispered to him that he needed to do it; he needed to confess to him or marry him or _something._ He decided he would ask him. And he would _not _take no for an answer. ...after Ludwig finished talking, of course.

Ludwig stepped out of the door and onto the concrete step that Feli was also standing on. He closed the door behind him and looked at his friend. "Um…s-so, I've been doing a lot of thinking…"

Feliciano nodded.

"…okay, maybe not a lot, but you know. I've just…been thinking about this for a while now, and I decided that I really can't hold it in any longer…"

He looked down for a moment, reached for Feliciano's hand. He held it in his own gently, Feli's soft skin resting on his warmly. "And I wanted to ask you…"

Feliciano couldn't hear a word he was saying. Blood was pulsing in his ears and his entire being was practically on fire. He _knew _what Ludwig was going to ask, he just couldn't wait to hear it coming from his own mouth.

"If, um…if you would want to be m-my boyfriend. Maybe?" And as soon as it left his mouth and he heard it with his own ears, Ludwig felt incredibly stupid. He felt stupid for asking, and scared of any kind of rejection he'd get, which he was positive he would.

But he almost jumped when Feliciano softly grabbed his other hand, curling his slim fingers in between Ludwig's own. He looked at the smiling Italian and struggled to breathe; he couldn't remember how. The shorter boy stepped closer and pulled him into a warm hug.

"You don't even have to ask." He said, nuzzling his head into Ludwig's collar.

And something like fireworks went off in each of them. No… it was something bigger than that, but with less of a noise. Something subtle and surprising at the same time, if there is such a thing. Both of them were overcome with such warmth and elation that it was almost too much to handle. And they could've stayed there on Ludwig's porch, hugging like long-lost lovers, had the sky not grown fearsome and heavy with tears. Dry thunder crackled far off passed the cul-de-sac, though it was loud and sudden enough to make either jump. Feliciano slipped away from him with a wide, goofy grin.

"Can I have a goodbye kiss?" he asked, twirling one scuffed shoe tip into the concrete.

"A kiss...?" Ludwig repeated. His mind was fuzzy and everything just seemed to slip by him. He couldn't get a hold of himself or his surroundings, which he couldn't decide was good or bad.

"Yeah~" Feli smiled again.

"I…yeah, I suppose…" Ludwig murmured and looked him in the eyes. Feliciano's were half-lidded and hazy, just like his. Feli had big and beautiful brown eyes; the kind that just melt your heart and make you sigh happily. He leaned, almost knocking their heads together, to give him a peck on the cheek. Feliciano let out a boyish giggle before kissing Ludwig on the cheek as well.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Ludi~!" Feliciano said and hopped down the step, then made his way to his own house before it started pouring on him. Ludwig waved after him, making sure he got inside okay. He then turned and opened his own front door, still feeling dazed.

Gilbert was leaning against the wall, smirking at him. "So, you finally grew a pair and asked him out, huh?"

"…yeah…" Ludwig said, feeling less joyful now that Feliciano wasn't next to him.

"Well...what did he say?"

"W-we're together now, if that's what you mean."

"That's great!" Gilbert walked over and slapped him on the back. "I told you it'd be fine!"

"Yeah…but...I think I have to go throw up, now…"

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><p><strong>This one was shorter but it was FOR A GOOD CAUSE, no?<strong>

**I'm sorry, I know I said I would get it up yesterday, technically. But I got distracted like CRAZY and ended up finishing it just now. T^T Anyway, it's like 2:30 am, so I have to sleep now…**


	12. Chapter 12

Feliciano gently closed the door behind him, a happy grin spread across his face. The warmness in his chest hadn't faded out yet, and he was truly thankful for that. But he had a tiny, aching need in the back of his head. He needed to tell someone, or maybe the whole world, about the wonderful thing that had just happened to him. Hell, he would dedicate a whole page in his sketchbook to it if no one would listen.

He heard the water running in the kitchen. Excitedly, he sprinted to the arched doorway and peeked inside. Antonio was cutting something on a board on the counter while the water ran. Feli stepped inside and sat on the counter by the sink.

"Hey, guess what!"

Antonio jumped, the knife he was holding slipped and sputtered against the tile of the kitchen floor. He turned and looked at Feli, who was holding his mouth in surprise.

"Oh wow, I…I'm sorry." He said, leaning forward to look and make sure Antonio still had all of his toes.

The Spaniard chuckled and picked up the knife, tossing it into the sink and shutting off the water. "You're too much."

"I said I was sorry~! But Toni, you still have to guess!"

"Guess what?"

"…oh, I guess you can go first, if you have something to say."

"Huh? Wait, what's going on?" Antonio shook his head and widened his eyes in confusion. Feliciano did just about the same.

"Um, well, I have something really important to tell you! But you can't tell Lovino, okay?"

"Oh, ah, alright." Antonio leaned against the counter and crossed his arms.

"I have a boyfriend now~!" Feliciano said in a rather loud whisper, smiling at the way Antonio's face lit up.

"Really! Who is it? What's his name? Is he cute?"

"His name is Ludwig, he lives next door."

"What?" Antonio uncrossed his arms and smiled even wider. "Gilbert's brother? No way! That's so cool! I can't wait to tell him! Oh, hey, what's Ludwig like? I've only met him once, he seems pretty quiet."

"Oh," Feli started to lightly swing his legs, his heels just barely touching the cabinet each time. "He is. He's really tall, too."

"Well so is Gilbert."

"Yeah, but Ludi is taller!"

"Really?" Antonio tilted his head. "That's strange."

"Mhm. He's really sweet and kind, but he doesn't really like to show it…not like Lovino, though. Ludwig isn't an angry person like him."

"Aw, he sounds nice! Oh, you know what? We should have him over for dinner tonight. I was just starting it, so you could help me finish and then you can call him up."

"But what about fratello? He…ah, he really hates Ludwig…"

"Does he…?" Antonio thought for a moment, tapped his chin thoughtfully. "I think I have a remedy for that."

Feli raised an eyebrow as Antonio reached around in the upper cabinets for a bottle of wine and a glass cup. "I'm sorry, but you'll have to finish making dinner if I do this, okay? But I promise it'll be worth it!"

"What the hell is going on, here?" Lovino stood in the doorway, rubbing at one eye. "I was trying to nap like a normal person but you bastards are having drum rehearsal in here or something."

Antonio shot a smile at Feli, then winked, and grabbed the bottle of wine off the counter. "Now, now, Lovi. How about you and I just go lay down for a while and have a little drink?"

"Shut up. …That sounds good."

And once both the Spaniard and his Italian had left the room, Feliciano turned to the cutting board and looked at the half-sliced tomato sitting on it. …How was he supposed to make an entire meal out of one tomato…? Feliciano shook his head slightly and then reached down into the lower cabinets to pull out a sack of flour. He made a trip to the fridge next, taking out a carton of eggs. Grandpa always said, "When in doubt, make pasta."

Gilbert sipped at a freshly opened bottle of beer and sighed. This probably wasn't a good night to be drinking, but he didn't really care at the moment. The counter he leant against was cool against his lower back. He rubbed at his eyes for a moment, sighing again, and looked at the floor. Everything was bothering him, but he wouldn't dare tell anyone. It wasn't like he could fix anything, anyway…

The wired phone hanging on the wall began to make shrill ringing noises suddenly, making Gilbert snap his head up and blink. He walked over to the phone and yanked at it, putting it to his ear.

"Hallo." he huffed.

"Ciao, Mr. Gilbert! Is Ludwig there?"

"Uhhhhmmm…." Gilbert looked around the room, confused, and then remembered Ludwig had actually run to the bathroom a minute ago. "I think he went to go throw up or something."

"Oh, he's sick? Oh no! Now what am I gonna d-"

"No, he's not sick. I'm not sure why he's puking, but he's not sick."

"Oh. Oh, okay. Well, can you have him call me back, please? We want to have him over for dinner!"

"Yeah, sure."

"Thanks! I, uh…I guess I'll talk to you later, then."

"Mhm."

Gilbert hung up without another word. He took a swig from the brown-tinted bottle in his hand and groaned. He heard a toilet flush from far off and a door swing open. Light footsteps led their way to the kitchen as a seriously pale Ludwig shuffled on the hardwood flooring. Gilbert looked at him indifferently.

"Feliciano just called."

"He did?" Ludwig asked, his voice noticeably hoarse. His hands were shaking as well.

"Mhm. He wants you over for dinner or something."

"Oh good, I'm starving now."

"That's…kinda sick. But you should call him back."

"Yeah, yeah…"

Ludwig rubbed at the side of his face and nodded. He stood, brushing passed Gilbert to pick up the phone and hit the redial button. It rang obnoxiously a few times before being picked up on the receiving end.

"Hello?" the familiar voice asked. Ludwig felt his heart speed up and he couldn't help but feel nauseas all over again.

"Hey, it's Ludwig."

"Hi~! How are you feeling?"

"Um, I'm okay. Gilbert said you want to have me over."

"Oh, yes! I made a special dinner and I want you to come eat it with us~!"

"Ah, okay. I'll be over in a second, alright?"

"Alright! I'll see you soon~!"

"Mhm, bye."

Ludwig hung up the phone and turned to his brother, who gave him a cheeky smile and walked off with a few more beer bottles in hand. Ludwig only shook his head and went to grab a jacket before heading outside.

It was dark already, like the middle of the night, despite it only being around 7. It was difficult to tell what was cloud and what was sky; but the occasional glare of lightning far off could give a hint. Ludwig shivered at the suddenly cool air. The lights in Feli's home were brightly lit compared to the other houses…which wasn't all that surprising, really.

He rang the doorbell and waited, rubbing his hands together to try and warm them up. The door opened soundlessly and Ludwig turned, confused at the sight of someone peeking at him suspiciously from behind it. The person squinted and huffed, then turned his head.

"Feli! A strange man is at our door!" he whipped his head around again and stared right at Ludwig. "…he kinda looks like an angel. You might wanna grab a bible."

A laugh came from behind the door as another person approached, opening the wooden barrier. "Don't be silly, Lovi."

Lovino was pushed aside and the door was opened. Feliciano reached out, grabbed Ludwig's hand, pulled him inside, and shut the door. He quickly reached up to give the other a kiss on the cheek before leading him to the kitchen.

"You can sit wherever you want, we've got plenty of chairs." Feliciano said while turning a dial on the stove and stirring something in one of the pots. Ludwig nodded and took a seat on one side of the table, where a sparkling white plate was placed before him on a dark green table mat.

Stomp-like footsteps started suddenly, and before he knew, a rather confused Lovino sat directly across from Ludwig at the table. The Italian man sat his elbows on the edge and cradled his chin with the back of his hands.

"So…you're Ludwig, huh?" he said, squinting again.

"Uh…yeah. I think we've met before."

"Ohhhh yes. You're the rapper, right?" Lovino took a glass of wine from the counter and sipped at it.

"…excuse me?"

"You're the German rapper guy! You know!" he smiled. _Smiled._

Ludwig shook his head, utterly confused. "Um…n-no, I think you have the wrong person in mind…I can't rap…"

"No? Not even in German?"

"No…"

"Hm." Lovino shrugged and took another sip of the wine.

This was…

This was strange. Very, very strange.

Suddenly Lovino jerked and snorted into his glass, making it spill and splash onto the table. He let out a girly giggle and set the cup on the table. "Oh shit…"

He reached for a washcloth with _the _biggest smile on his face while wiping up his mess, giggling the entire time.

"…are you okay?" Ludwig asked awkwardly while watching him struggle to stand and put the cloth in the sink.

"Huh? Oh, I'm fine~!" he laughed and sat again. "Say, can you play the accordion?"

Ludwig shook his head and furrowed his brow. "Um…no…"

"Shit. I was in the mood for some polka music. Ah ha ha~!"

Ludwig, to say the least, was creeped out. Very much so.

"Okay~! Dinner's done!" Feli announced and swung around with a steaming pan in hand. "I hope you like ravioli, Ludi!"

Antonio joined them quietly, sitting next to a clearly intoxicated Lovino. Feliciano went around the table and poured some of the pasta onto everyone's plates, then took his own seat next to Ludwig. Lovino began eating immediately, shoving entire wads of steaming ravioli into his mouth. Antonio watched him with a strange look; one that Ludwig couldn't explain even if he tried. It was almost like disgust, but a little bit of amusement and maybe _something else _in there, too…

And once he had choked down all of his meal (wow, stomach ache, much…) he sighed loudly and leaned against his chair. He eyed everyone at the table, placing his hands behind his head.

"So, Feli," he started, leaning back on the chair and causing the first two legs to tip into the air. "did you know that Ludwig here is a famous rapper from Germany?"

Feliciano coughed and inhaled his drink before laughing and wiping at his mouth. "Oh god, Lovi, what gave you that idea?"

"Well…it's obviously the giant gold chain he's wearing." Lovino smirked as if he'd made some winning argument in a debate, and then took a gulp of his wine.

Feliciano leant forward, looking over Ludwig with a stupid smile. "What are you talking about? He's not wearing anything."

"Oh god, he's naked?" Lovino sputtered. "Damn, I need glasses!"

Feli let out a high-pitched laugh that matched the slightly lower tone of his brother's, making some kind of incredibly harmonic yet creepy sound. Antonio started to giggle as well, while Ludwig stared at all of them and wondered why _he _had to be the one surrounded by a bunch of drunken idiots. …besides Feli.

"Mmmmhey! Hey! You know what? I think we should all have a polka party!" Lovino smiled again and leant forward, his chair loudly meeting the ground and probably leaving scuff marks. "A-and Ludders here could sing us some German rap~!"

"Excuse me, did you say 'Ludders'?" Ludwig shook his head for the umpteenth time that day. "That's…that's a new one."

"I think it's cute!" Feliciano reached over and held Ludwig's hand, then smiled at him. Ludwig couldn't help but smile back.

Their cute little moment was cut short, however, as Antonio suddenly yelped. They looked over and saw Lovino smirking like an idiot with his hand under the table, no doubt doing something immoral to Antonio as the Spaniard's face grew increasingly redder. He let out a nervous laugh and grabbed Lovino's hand, ceasing its motion.

"Ah ha ha, well! I-It looks like me and Lovi will have to leave now, if you don't mind! Um…don't get into the wine or anything, okay? It's hard enough trying to handle this drunk guy~!" He hauled Lovino off his chair and dragged him out of the room. Ludwig and Feliciano stared at the doorway for a while.

"…I'm really sorry about that. It was the only way you'd be able to come over…"

"…what, getting him drunk?" Ludwig chuckled a little, the idea sounding ridiculous but plausible at the same time.

"Yeah… oh hey, did you like it? The ravioli?" Feliciano scooted his chair closer and held onto Ludwig's arm.

"Yeah, it was delicious. Did you make it by yourself?"

"Yep! My grandpa taught me how to make all kinds of dishes from scratch~!"

"That's…kind of amazing."

Feliciano smiled and nuzzled Ludwig's shoulder. "So…do you wanna watch a movie or something? There's a bad storm coming in, so you might have to stay for a while."

"…but I live a few steps away…"

Feliciano pouted. "You don't get it…oh, well. Anyway, I don't want you to have to walk in the rain; even if it's just for a little bit. You can still catch a cold, and then I'll have to come and take care of you! And then I'll get sick, so you'd have to take care of me; and then it'll just go in one big circle like that."

"Oh, really? Just like that?" Ludwig smiled at him. "Then alright, let's watch something. But we should clean the dishes first."

"Awh! …alright…" Feliciano let go of him and picked up his plate, then walked to the sink.

After a few minutes of splashing water onto each other and complaining about the loud garbage disposal, Ludwig and Feliciano had settled down onto the couch and started the watch _The Lion King._

Ludwig was squished against the end on the couch with Feliciano snuggled into him and a blanket wrapped around them both. The lights were off and the only sort of illumination was the brightness of the TV flashing on their faces and the walls. Ludwig shifted down a little so that he could use the armrest as a pillow. Feliciano moved to lay in front of him, so Ludwig could lay an arm on his side and get comfortable.

Near the end of the movie, Feliciano had fallen asleep and flipped over so his face was pressed into Ludwig's neck. He had snaked an arm under the blanket to curl around the German's back and hold him in a loose hug. Ludwig felt so warm and happy, even though he couldn't care less about the movie. This felt perfect, the way Feli fit perfectly into his arms and how the sound of his breathing was lulling him to sleep. He tilted his head downward for a moment and kissed Feliciano's forehead, then the tip of his nose, and the lightest kiss he could on top of his lips. Feli stirred a moment and pressed back, adding the tiniest bit of pressure. Ludwig squeezed him tightly and sighed into his hair.

He felt like he might explode.

…But it was definitely better than needing to throw up.

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><p><strong>Dear Sammicakes: NOT AS PLANNED.<strong>

**But oh well. T^T**


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey, guys! Happy extremely belated Labor Day! :D**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed and answered my question~! I've come to a conclusion, and I tried to message everyone who responded; so I'm sorry if I missed you. But to those of you who don't know, then it'll be a surprise! X3 (Yes, I'm evil, I know.)**

**Oh, and I apologize for not updating last week. I was writing something amazing with my buddy Sammi~ :D**

**Okay, enjoy~!**

**P.S.- there's a giant monologue from Gilbert at the end. It's necessarily pitiful. T^T**

* * *

><p>The first thing Ludwig noticed was that his shoulder hurt like hell. Whatever kind of couch this was…it was not meant to be slept on. The second thing he noticed was that Feliciano was no longer next to him. The Italian had fallen off the couch in his sleep and was currently sprawled on the floor with his mouth wide open. <em>How can anyone sleep like that…?<em>

Ludwig stretched silently and tugged his phone from his pocket. He had 5 missed calls and 12 text messages…all from Gilbert. He suddenly felt guilty for not answering him, or even telling him he was spending the night, but part of him couldn't care less. If Gilbert was really that concerned he would've torn up half the neighborhood looking for him. And as far as Ludwig knew, the entire street was still intact.

But then, the horribly disheartening thought hit him. He checked the time on his phone and nearly started hyperventilating as he read aloud, "11:23 a.m."

Shit.

Shit, shit, _shit._

Ludwig sat up and reached down, shaking Feliciano's shoulder. It was Tuesday, they had school, and they were already about four hours late. Feli mumbled something unintelligent and flipped onto his back, peering up at Ludwig with sleepy eyes.

"Good morning!" He said, smiling wide.

"We have to go to school!" Ludwig wasted no time in telling him, watching as Feliciano's eyes went wide and awake.

"…oh shit." The Italian said, rolling onto his stomach and pushing himself off the floor. He pivoted around for a moment, trying to sort through his thoughts and figure out what the fuck he needed to do, but was interrupted when a bubbly Spaniard entered the room.

"Hey, sleepyheads!" he beamed and walked into the kitchen.

"Antonio!" Feli shouted for no real reason. Antonio whipped around with a serious expression, shushing the frantic brunet.

"Shshshshhh! Lovi's got a hangover! He's gonna destroy the world if you yell like that!"

"…Antonio!" Feli stage whispered. "We're late for school! Home come no one woke us up?"

"Oh!" he uttered and rummaged in the cabinets for some coffee. "I did you a favor and called you in sick. Gil called in Ludwig, too. So you guys can have fun and do nothing all day~!"

As if on cue, both boys froze and gaped at him. Who the hell does that, anyway?

"Oh…well thank you, Toni!" Feliciano smiled at him.

Ludwig took his phone out again and sifted through the messages and found that all 12 of them were just a long rant about how Gilbert wanted a pet bird. The only voicemail he had (out of the 5 missed calls, Gil only left one voicemail) was indeed his brother explaining he had called Ludwig in because Antonio had threatened to kill him if he didn't.

Suddenly the Spaniard's smile seemed a little less inviting.

"Ludwig, we should go out today!" Feliciano reached over and grabbed his hand. "We should get ice cream and go to the lake and go to the park and to the movies and-"

"Ah, well, how about we just start with the ice cream?" Ludwig mentioned, beginning to feel overwhelmed with all the suggestions. Feliciano squeezed his hand and smiled.

"Okay~! See you later, Antonio!"

"Bye!" he called from the kitchen.

The two walked clear out to the little ice cream shop by the Food Mart. It was a tiny little place owned by a family that lived on the outskirts of town. It wasn't the best shop there was, but they did have some pretty tasty popsicles. Feliciano insisted on sharing a vanilla cone with Ludwig, so they got a single cone half covered in sprinkles (for Feli) and sat on a bench nearby.

"Hey Ludwig," Feliciano said, pausing to lick a plain stripe up the assortment of colored sprinkles. He smacked his lips. "what should we do after this?"

Ludwig looked away from his boyfriend (he never thought he'd ever get to use that term) and cleared his throat. "U-uh…well, we could go to the park nearby. Or we could go by my house and get some fishing poles and head to the lake for a while."

"Eww, Luddy, you fish?"

"Yeah, sometimes."

Feliciano wiggled around in his seat and scrunched up his face. "Do you…do you stick the worm on the hook all by yourself?"

Ludwig smiled a little, amused at the other's question. "Yeah, how else am I going to catch anything?"

"But doesn't that hurt the worm?"

"Well…well yeah, I guess."

"And then you drown the poor thing! And then it gets eaten! That's horrible!"

"Okay, okay, we won't go fishing! God…"

"…Are you mad at me?" Feliciano handed him the licked-to-death ice cream cone and wiped at his mouth. "Because if you want to, you can go fishing. I can sit and watch. I just don't want to be the one torturing the little worm."

Ludwig chuckled a little and took a bite of the smooth ice cream. "No, it's okay. We can just go to the park for a bit."

Once Ludwig had finished off the cone, they stood and laced hands once again and headed for the park.

The park wasn't too exciting. Just a slide, a jungle gym, some monkey bars, and a few swings. Feliciano led them to the swings and sat in one, asking Ludwig to push him. The blond complied, pushing gently against Feliciano's back.

"Aw, c'mon, Lud! I'm not gonna break! Push harder!" Feliciano laughed and pumped his legs.

Ludwig blushed a little and did so, pushing with enough force to nearly knock Feliciano from his seat.

"Wah! Ludwig! Not so hard! I'm gonna die!" He wailed from up above in the air. Ludwig laughed and pushed hard again, making Feliciano scream into the slightly chilly air. "Ludwiiiiig! I'm gonna fly off this thing and I'm gonna die if you don't stop!"

"You won't die," Ludwig replied, pushing just a little gentler against his back. "If anything, you'll land in the sand pit over there. It's completely safe!"

"We should've gone fishing!"

Ludwig laughed and helped bring Feli to a stop. Immediately, Feliciano tried to stand, but gripped Ludwig's jacket as he slunk back into the seat.

"Ve…my legs feel funny…l-look what you did!" he teased.

Ludwig moved to stand in front of him, smiling the little smile he rarely showed to anyone besides Feliciano. He leaned down without a word and kissed him lightly in apology. Feliciano kissed him back sweetly in forgiveness. They broke apart soundlessly, both smiling like children.

"Ludwig, can we go home? It's cold."

"Yeah. School's probably out by now anyway." Ludwig replied, taking off his jacket and slipping it over Feli's shoulders. It was a little big on him, but he looked so cute with oversized sleeves anyway.

Ludwig walked Feliciano up to the doorstep. Feli tried to shrug off the large jacket to give it back, but Ludwig stopped him and said he could wear it to school tomorrow since it would be cold in the morning. Feli thanked him with a kiss and waddled inside, saying a few too many goodbyes for such a short time. Ludwig grinned and started walking towards his own house, where his brother was sitting on the porch steps. A cigarette was wedged between his lips and his eyes were downcast.

"That's new," Ludwig sighed and sat on the porch next to his brother. Gilbert considered flicking ash at him but decided against it. He blew a little smoke ring and rubbed at his forehead.

"It's really not."

"How long have you been smoking?"

"A few months now." Gilbert took another drag and hung his head.

"You should stop. Everything will smell like smoke. And you'll die." Ludwig looked at him with a blank expression.

"Yeah, no shit, Sherlock."

Ludwig looked away to the dull leaves. A particularly cool breeze ruffled his loose hair and made his arms cold.

"What's eating you?" Ludwig asked, felling that his brother had been seemingly depressed out in the open on purpose.

"Our whore of a mother called." Gilbert nearly growled.

"Hey, don't disrespect mom like that-"

"Like anyone should respect that hateful bitch. Do you know why our parents rarely call me? Why they don't expect me home on the holidays? Why they don't mention me to people they meet? They both hate my guts. They think I'm a horrible failure and I should cease to exist; just because I didn't want to be a fucking lawyer like vati or a doctor like mutti." Gilbert took a particularly long intake from the stick in his mouth. The stench of smoke lingered on his tongue after he blew it away. "I just wanted to be an auto mechanic, that's all…"

"That was…that was sudden…Gil, I didn't know, I-"

"It's fine. The whole world hates me. I bet God is laughing at me right now and he plans to stick me in purgatory after I die."

"Gilbert, stop talking like that! We all have problems."

"Fucking hell, could you stop being such a conceited asshole for one goddamn minute and just _let me talk?_" Gilbert spat at him, his crimson eyes glowing red like burning coals. Ludwig swallowed and nodded. Gilbert didn't say a thing for a moment, as if he were trying to put his feelings into words.

"…I moved out as soon as I could. Partially because I hated that house and everyone in it, but also because they threatened to kick me out almost every week. I wasn't _that _bad of a kid really…I mean, I got in a few fights and I had detentions here and there, but it's not like I huffed paint and lit houses on fire. My grades were great and I always did my work. I don't understand why they were so disappointed with me."

Ludwig stayed quiet as Gilbert took a moment to flick his cigarette onto the concrete and snuff it out with his shoe. "But they always liked you. And I hated you for that."

"…you hate me?"

"Of course not. Not anymore. Back then I did, though. They paid more attention to you when you were growing up and they never once yelled at you. I hated that because it wasn't fair to me. And when I was old enough, I wanted to leave as soon as I could so I wouldn't have to deal with that anymore. They agreed to help me find a decent place, which ended up being a fucking house all to myself, and it was far away from any kind of big city. I liked that."

Gilbert smiled briefly and looked at the ground. "Then I found a job at Francis' restaurant. He hired me because I looked so pitiful, he said… but he also said he'd pay me more because I was incredibly handsome or some shit. That guy is a freak but I owe him for that. And then Elizaveta moved in next door, and I really thought my life was finally going in the right direction."

Ludwig couldn't tell whether he should smile at that or not. It sounded so bittersweet.

"I started talking to her and we actually became good friends. But then she met Roderich. She stopped spending time with me so she could go try and win him over. I got so mad… I was there first, after all. I should've been top priority. …She didn't understand that when I tried to tell her what I meant. I told her I was feeling neglected and she blew it out of proportion, accusing me of being 'a jealous douchebag and telling her who she could and couldn't be friends with'. …I wasn't. I was just trying to keep her close. But it didn't work.

"So she did away with me. And that's when I realized how lonely I really was. I regretted not spending time with you, because I could've built up a friendship and we could've talked over the phone and I wouldn't feel like I needed to cry every night. And that's when I started thinking about my life and where I was, and I figured I was really a failure after all. I didn't have friends, my parents hated me, my genius little brother probably didn't know I existed, my dream girl didn't want to even look at me, and I couldn't even get a job as an auto mechanic because there wasn't an auto shop around at the time."

"And that's when you came home for a year, right?" Ludwig asked quietly.

"Yeah. I just needed some actual human interaction aside from being yelled at by Elizaveta. So I took that time to get to know you and try and patch things up with mom and dad. And I remember they were talking about moving back to Germany, and I started to panic, because that meant they would take you with them and then I would really be alone. I somehow convinced them to stay…at least until you were old enough to move out on your own. So if they run away to good ol' Deutschland as soon as your feet are out the door, you'll know why." Gilbert finally looked at him, not a single trace of emotion left in his eyes or his voice.

Ludwig nodded and looked way. "…I...Is that all?"

"Yep. I think that's it." Gilbert rubbed at the side of his face and let out a deep breath. "I'm sorry, I just…really needed to get that off my chest. It was bothering me really bad. …so thanks for listening."

Ludwig clapped a hand on Gilbert's shoulder. "It's not a problem. Now, uh…do we have any chapstick? It was windy today and, uh…"

Gilbert snorted and shook his head. "You're so stupid for a smart kid. Yeah, I think we've got some in the upstairs bathroom."

And as Ludwig went inside the house silently, Gilbert wondered briefly if he had been listening at all.

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><p><strong>Bittersweet ending is bittersweet.<strong>

**Fishing is in my blood, broskis. Fishing and racing and it's a wonder I'm not a redneck. xD**

**Anyway, HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE, BATMAN! 110 reviews? You guys are amazing and I love all of you. Thanks guys, I really love hearing what you have to say! :,D**

**Oh! I was thinking about this a bit ago, but how would you guys feel if I made a Tumblr for your amusement? I'd try to update it every day to keep you guys on tab with whatever the heck I'm doing. And I'd probably post some artwork I've done, too (writing is only a hobby, I like to focus more on my drawing skeelz). OH AND GIFS. Gifs are what make Tumblr amazing.**

**SO ANYWAY! If you guys think that'd be cool, just lemme know! X3**


	14. Chapter 14

**I'm sorry I fail so hard at life, guys. School happened, and then I was sick, and then I got writer's block, and then I went on vacation, and then there was make up work, and…**

**Anyway, here you go.**

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><p>The ocean is a big, mysterious place.<p>

Ludwig blinked against the light breeze. The water was dark like oil and the moonlight licked off the waves like a flame, the reflection reaching just to where his toes dipped into the sand. The grains were soft like powder and sly like quicksand, pulling his heels in slowly. Ludwig turned to the moon to drink in its pale glow.

"Ludwig," a soft voice called from behind him. He turned around, his hair pulling away from its usual cage of gel.

Feliciano smiled at him, his own hair already touched by the sea water and sunlight; curved into boyish waves as if he'd been surfing. He held out a tanned hand. "Come. I want to show you something."

Ludwig stared at his outstretched hand. Feliciano's smile was different somehow. He slid his fingers into the curve of Feli's palm anyway and tightened his grip. Feliciano led him across the sand and into the sea, where the smell of salt and thick air swirled around their heads. They were thigh-deep into the water when Ludwig's head began to swim. He looked to the shrinking shore and held his breath.

Feliciano kept walking against the waves, dragging him onward. Ludwig was panicking and switching his gaze from the land to his love. He was torn between the safety of the soft sand and wherever Feli was taking him. There couldn't be much out here to show; after all, it was just water and waves...

Feliciano paused and turned back to Ludwig. He smiled sweetly, and then told him to watch carefully. He dipped a single finger into the water and closed his eyes. Ludwig watched his hand and grew astonished as the water change color, rippling a vibrant red from his index finger and on outward. The ocean began to glow scarlet and lit up their skin along with the crashing water. Feliciano smirked at Ludwig's reaction and bit his lip, stepping a bit closer than Ludwig felt was necessary.

"Cool, huh?" Feli whispered and ran a hand slowly up Ludwig's arm. The blond nodded, speechless, as Feli kneaded Ludwig's bicep absently. Feliciano then rubbed against his pectorals gently, sliding even closer so that his and Ludwig's stomachs touched.

Ludwig's voice didn't work. He felt his vocal chords were missing. He wanted to protest, to tell Feliciano to stop before things got out of hand, but he couldn't. The blood-red sand beneath the reddened waves had grasped his ankles and was holding him still.

He couldn't move away.

Feli dragged his fingers up Ludwig's neck; feather light touches that left him to shiver subtly. Those dexterous fingers swept against the down-like hair of Ludwig's neck. The Italian smiled and gripped Ludwig's hair, yanking back playfully and watching as Ludwig jerked. He laughed a little and leaned closer, petting the back of Ludwig's neck as he whispered vulgar things into his ear. The blond let him, let him tell him all these things he didn't want to hear, and just stared up at the moon lifelessly. It grew dimmer as he felt kisses at his neck and bites on his collar.

And just as the world grew impossibly darker, Ludwig woke up.

The sun had left and risen again in what felt like mere minutes. Ludwig stumbled out of bed in the dark and knocked just about everything off his nightstand in the process. He shuffled down the stairs and into the living room, where Gilbert was furiously playing an old Zelda game. Ludwig wasn't much into Zelda, so he had no idea what title it was. The graphics sucked anyway.

He decided to watch Gilbert play for a bit anyhow, since he didn't need to leave for another half hour.

"Is this the trippy one?" Ludwig asked, sitting on the arm of the couch. Gilbert glanced at him.

"What?"

"You know, the trippy one… the one with the mask from hell or something?"

"Majora's Mask? No, this is Ocarina of Time." He turned his strangely wide eyes back to the screen.

"That sounds gay." Ludwig huffed and moved onto an actual couch cushion.

"Yeah, well, you're gay." Irritating yelling came from the screen. "Gah…I hate this place. All these damn hidden monsters and shit. I don't have time for this."

Ludwig watched as his brother rapidly pressed a few buttons, causing the boy on screen to roll and grunt like there was no tomorrow. It was incredibly annoying. Ludwig kept watching anyway, trying to ignore the horrible sound effects.

"Hey Gil, can I talk to you about something?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well, I've been having these weird dreams lately. And they didn't start until a few weeks after Feliciano and I started dating."

Gilbert made a pained face as he guided the boy on screen to the safety of an invisible ledge. "Yeah, those are called wet dreams. You kinda get used to them after a while. You know how to use the washing machine, right?"

"That's not what I meant!" Ludwig said hurriedly and sat rigid.

"Oh. Well I don't know anything about any other kinds of dreams. So it sucks to be you, I guess." He shrugged. He then paused the game suddenly, a smirk forming on his face. "Wanna see some cartridge tipping?"

"No…I have to leave anyway. Have a good day at work."

"'Kay, don't get beat up or anything."

Ludwig only pinched the bridge of his nose as he left the house. 

The buses pulled into the back parking lot, Ludwig found, and not the front. Actually, the back was the front, but it looked like the back. So the buses _did _pull into the front, but…

Anyway, Ludwig spotted Feliciano talking animatedly with Timo (who was listening with just as much enthusiasm) by the door and nearly speed walked there. Timo recognized him right away, smiling and tapping Feliciano on the shoulder to turn his attention towards him. Feliciano beamed when he saw him and waved to Timo as the boy skipped off suddenly. Ludwig gave him a half-hearted shrug when he asked why the other left. Feliciano shrugged back and calmly took Ludwig's hand in his own, leading them towards the door and into the school.

"Oh, uh…I don't think that's such a great idea...don't you know what people will do when they see us holding hands?"

Feliciano looked at the ground for a moment, gazing at his scuffed Converse. He looked up at Ludwig.

"When my grandpa was in the hospital and was nearing his time, I asked him not to leave because I was afraid no one would protect me anymore. He told me I shouldn't be ashamed or afraid of who I am. He said there's no one just like me, and that I'm special because of that. So since then I haven't been afraid to show the real me to people." Feliciano said and held out his hand. "You shouldn't be ashamed either. You are who you are, and you mean the world to me."

Ludwig swallowed, looking into Feliciano's dark doe eyes. He exhaled silently and reached for his boyfriend's hand as they walked into the school together.

Homeroom apparently didn't exist anymore. Feli had explained to Ludwig that they only had it on the first day so the freshmen could get a briefing of the school's rules and regulations before the day started. Ludwig was starting to think he needed one now, considering he couldn't remember half of his classes. Feliciano patted him on the back as reassurance and started leading him all around the student center, introducing him to all sorts of people who happened to be his friends. When the bell rang, people began to file towards every exit there was. Ludwig, as expected, had gotten separated from Feliciano even though they were both heading for the gym. The German spotted a certain loud-mouthed semi-friend of his and chose to follow him instead. He caught up with the boy quickly, getting his attention by tapping him on the shoulder. Something seemed a bit off, however…

"Hey Alfred," he said, a little confused at the other's sudden strange expression. "…did you do something with your hair?"

"Um, I-I'm Matthew. I'm Alfred's brother." He said in a quiet voice, almost a whisper. Ludwig raised an eyebrow at him. Alfred never mentioned anything about have a brother…

"…are you going to the gym or not? I forgot how to get there." He said simply. He only felt bad once he realized how rude that sounded.

The other boy sighed and closed his eyes. He nodded and led Ludwig around a corner and through a wide hallway, straight to the locker room. Ludwig thanked him and hurried off into the gym.

"So Lud, you know that Austrian English teacher, right? I heard something weird about him the other day." Alfred smiled and pushed his glasses back up onto his nose when he saw Ludwig approaching. Ludwig briefly wondered if those glasses were even prescription.

Ludwig was about to lie and say he didn't care to hear when a pair of cold hands covered his eyes. Ludwig flinched for a second as a breathy "Guess who?" was whispered into his ear. He smiled for a split second before peeling the clammy hands off his face and turning his head to see Feliciano beaming at him. The Italian boy stood at his side, gripping one of Ludwig's hands tightly and pecking him on the cheek.

A look of shock played at Alfred's face subtly, trying to comprehend what just happened. Ludwig suddenly felt the heat drain from his face.

_Alfred didn't like faggots_.

"Hi Alfred!" Feliciano said, oblivious to the situation. "How are you?"

"Fine," Alfred replied through a fake smile. "And yourself?"

"I'm fine~! Oh, look, Arthur's coming! Wow, I didn't know he could walk that fast."

Arthur was indeed speed walking towards Alfred, a panicked aura emanating from him. He reached Alfred's side and slung an arm around his shoulders.

"'Ello, you two," he smiled and Alfred tried to escape from his grasp.

"Hi! How are you doing?" Feliciano tilted his head at seeing Alfred's face turn a strange shade of red.

"I'm just fine, but I don't think I can say the same for this guy. Please excuse us for a moment..." And Arthur whisked Alfred away before either of them could say a word.

"What was that all about?" Feli asked and squeezed Ludwig's hand. He watched as the two boys began to bicker off in the distance. Alfred was waving his arms around and the tendons in his neck bulged like he was yelling. Arthur's jaw was clenched while he tapped a foot, trying to reason with the loud idiot. Ludwig let his hand slip from Feliciano's.

"I have no idea." 

While at lunch, a very strange thing happened. Ludwig had just sat down next to Feliciano when Arthur made his way to their table hesitantly. He took a deep breath and looked at the three of them, his green eyes settling on Kiku for a moment before straying back to the pair he actually meant to talk to.

"I'm sorry, on behalf of Alfred." Arthur said directly to Ludwig. "He isn't tolerant of many things, and it's a shame. He's ignorant and stupid and he doesn't understand things like this. So I'm sorry."

His (giant) eyebrows knitted together and he swallowed, making Ludwig a little suspicious.

"It's okay," Feliciano said from beside Ludwig. "...and I know what you're going through, Arthur."

The Brit froze, appalled. His face turned pale. "I...I don't know what you mean."

"Really, it's okay. I've been through it before, trust me." Feli made a sympathetic face that caused Arthur to purse his lips. He walked away hurriedly and kept his eyes low. Ludwig raised an eyebrow as he watched.

"What do you mean, Feli?" Ludwig asked once Arthur was out of hearing range. Feliciano shrugged and quickly delved into a different topic.

"Oh, so do you want to hear something strange? Miss Elizaveta called me last night. She was crying about something but I could hardly understand her."

Ludwig wasn't really listening, but he nodded anyway and stabbed at his lunch. He seriously hated the food here. He looked up from his meal and at Kiku for a moment, noticing that he was staring at something between his and Feliciano's heads. The Asian boy's eyes were narrowed menacingly and his eyebrows were pulled into a sharp angle, making him look rather fearsome for his small size. Feliciano was still rambling about Elizaveta.

"And so I asked her what was wrong and she said that Mister Roderich broke off the engagement with her. She tried to tell my why but then she started whimpering and blubbering so I promised her we could talk about it later. I dunno if I want to talk to her about it at all if all she's gonna do is cry, though." Feliciano said and shoved a forkful of pasta into his mouth. "Don't get the pasta here, by the way. It's horrible compared to my homemade pasta."

Kiku's lip twitched while he still glared between them. Ludwig had straightened and was fully focused on Kiku's angry expression, more bewildered than amused, really. Feliciano started giggling and poked Kiku's hand, asking, "Kiku, what on earth are you staring at?"

"Sadiq," he answered, clenching his hands under the table. "He's making faces again. I'm showing him how angry it makes me feel."

"Um…K-kiku, that's really not necessary. Just ignore him."

Kiku relaxed and let out a breath, his cheeks a strange shade of pink. He picked at his lunch and they all resumed their usual conversations, with just a little bit of awkward silence in between this time. 

After school, Feliciano swung open the door to his home and set his backpack on the ground. It smelled like sweet cinnamon for some reason.

"Lovino?" Feli called.

He ventured into the kitchen and picked up an apple, biting into it and looking around. "Fratello, where are you? Are you hiding?"

A crash travelled in the air from down the hall, followed by a muffled yell. Feliciano dropped his apple, afraid that Lovino and Antonio were fighting again. He listened hard while staring at the floor. Everything was silent, save for the ringing in his ears, but he couldn't help it. Tinnitus is a devil of a thing.

He crept down the hall towards his brother's room. A strange repeated noise, like creaking or thumping, grew louder as he approached the door. He listened for a moment, the voices still unclear to him, yet it still sounded like yelling. He placed a hand on the doorknob and pushed, causing the door to fly open in an unnecessarily dramatic manner.

His brother screamed and sat up, knocking his head into Antonio, who was above him with his hands on either side of Lovino's shoulders. He only smiled at Feli and said, "Oh, hi! We didn't know you'd be home so early! We were just...wrestling. A little bit."

Feliciano blushed a beet red and slammed the door shut. He stood outside for long time, until he heard the vulgar noises start again, at which he turned and shuffled down the hall and to the basement where his room was.

A little bit later, he was seated by himself on one side of the kitchen table, his cheeks flaring. Antonio and Lovino were on the other side; Lovino avoiding eye contact with both of them (and trying to smooth down his bed hair) while Antonio tried to think of a way to explain what they had done in the least embarrassing way possible.

"Umm...Feli...what we were doing...is something you shouldn't even consider trying until you're married."

"But you guys aren't married."

Antonio blinked. Lovino sighed angrily.

"Look, idiot. We can fuck whenever we want because we've been engaged for so fucking long and we're in love and all that shit. But you can't. So there."

"Ah, but why?"

"Because you're not old enough and you're stupid for thinking you are."

"But what if I really like someone and I think I love them? Can I do it then?"

"No."

"Awh, Lovi, you're being mean. It's not like he can get pregnant."

"But he might get someone else pregnant!"

"No I won't! Not unless he's secretly a girl!"

Lovino froze and looked at him strangely. Antonio took this opportunity to put his arm around the other's shoulders while he wasn't trying to get away. "What the hell?"

"You're silly, fratello!" Feliciano smiled and stuck his hands in his lap. "I've already told you, I have a boyfriend!"

"Who?" he asked, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.

"Ludwig! He lives next door!"

"FUCK NO!" he yelled and pushed Antonio from himself. "There's no way in hell you're dating him!"

Feliciano stilled and his smile fell. "But I am..."

"Why? Why the hell would you even want to be seen with that German douche?"

"Because I love him!" Feli retorted. He was beginning to feel angry and hurt, emotions he hadn't felt in a long time. "He's not a douche! He's very kind to me. He's a gentle person once you get to know him! And he's really tall and... and he's hot, and he's got the prettiest eyes I've ever seen."

"Prettier than mine?" Antonio pulled a sad face, looking at Feliciano with pitiful puppy dog eyes. Feli only smiled at him.

"No!" Lovino struggled against Antonio. "No, you can't date him! I forbid it!"

"Why?"

"Because I raised you better than to meddle with those ungodly macho jerks! They're liars and thieves and their food is terrible!"

"But that's not fair!" Feli stood from his seat and smacked his hands on the table. "I should be able to love whoever I want!"

"He's right, Lovino." Antonio said calmly. "You know my family is not fond of you, but I didn't let that stop me from being with you."

"Fuck you, this isn't about you. Feliciano, you can't date him. If you don't break it off with him, I'll ground you for so long you won't remember what the sun looks like. I'll take away all your stupid sketchbooks and your music and your right to watch Jersey Shore on the big TV. And if I find out that you lie to me, or you don't stop seeing him, I'll beat your ass so hard-"

"Lovino!" Antonio interrupted loudly, making both the brothers jump. "That's ridiculous! You can't do that to him!"

"I said stay out of this! And Feliciano, if you had any respect for the dead then you would listen to me and _dump him!_"

"And if _you _had any respect for the dead, you would do as grandpa said and just forgive!" Feliciano shot back. "Just because you have problems with trust doesn't mean I should, too!"

Lovino crossed his arms and leant forward. "Look. I'm only trying to protect you. Don't come crying to me when he ends up using you and leaving you because you weren't enough anymore."

Feliciano sat again and huffed, looking at his brother angrily. "But you don't know him like I do. He won't use me like that."

"Grandpa thought that too." Lovino said lowly, glaring at Feliciano. "And look at where that got him. If he hadn't met that horrible man then he would still be here with us."

"Excuse me, but what are we talking about?" Antonio cleared his throat and shifted in his seat.

"You can believe what you want, Lovino, but I'm not leaving him." Feliciano pushed away from the chair and walked to the stairs, staring at his feet as he descended.

Lovino sighed heavily and rubbed at his eyes. Antonio wrapped and arm around him and squeezed him tight. The Italian leaned his head into the other's neck. They were silent for what felt like hours.

"My grandfather was killed, "Lovino said finally, "at the hands of his best friend."

"Lovi…"

"Shut up, I'm not done." Lovino sighed and scratched the back of his head, smoothing down the hair again afterwards. "Anyway, he was killed by the only person he completely trusted other than my grandma. His name was Alfher, if I remember right."

"So what does that have to do with-"

"Oh my God, just _listen,_ Antonio. Think with your brain, not your mouth. …As I was _trying _to say, his friend's name was Alfher. I never liked him much, though. Even as a kid. He was too quiet and reserved… like whatever he was thinking about was too dangerous to be said. It's always the quiet ones, you know."

Antonio wanted to say something, anything, because Lovino was starting to lose his voice to the lump in his throat and the Spaniard hated seeing Lovino cry.

"He said he was from Germany. I had been there once when we still lived in Italy, but I didn't like it much. I hated it after… after grandpa passed. And I know he was caught for what he did, and he's in prison now, but… I can't bring myself to forgive him. Grandpa always told us to forgive people. Feliciano takes everything that man said to heart. And I guess I was starting to, but then that albino moved in next door and decided to bring his brother with him."

"…you don't like Germans in general just because of that man?"

"Not…not really, it's just… That macho jerk _looks exactly like him. _Right down to the point of his nose and the color of his eyes. And _that's _why Feliciano can't date him. He looks just like the man that killed our grandfather and stole half our precious family heirlooms."

"Oh, Lovi…" Antonio sighed and hugged him again, resting his head on the other's bony shoulder. "I know it's hard to forgive someone for something so terrible, but you have to understand that Ludwig isn't him. Ludwig is kind of like a kitten, you know?"

"I'm allergic to cats."

"…is that why I had to give Winnie away?"

"Yes."

"Huh. You told me she attacked you."

"She did. And I broke out in hives all over my arms and we had to high-tail it to the hospital, remember?"

"Um, anyway, Ludwig really is a kind person and I know for a fact he would never do anything to hurt Feli. Do you believe that now, since it's coming from me?"

"Honey, I don't believe half the things you say."

Antonio sighed and rubbed against Lovino's back again. "Well, I hope you believe me when I say I love you."

"Yeah, that's about the only thing I believe coming from you."

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><p><strong>LAME ENDING IS LAME.<strong>

**I'm sorryyyyy. School hates me. I don't like being a freshman. T^T**

**It's late, I'm going to bed…**


	15. Chapter 15

**Oh, hello there! I'm RaitoFlavoredWaffles, and I definitely didn't die and just come back to life. /cough**

**This time I would like to blame Christmas, finals, Skyward Sword, Durarara!, Homestuck, Darker Than Black, and Ouran High School Host Club, which I have been rewatching along with Death Note.**

**Oh, and Beavis and Butt-head for corrupting my morals for a bit, there. Fire, fire, FIRE! Hmm, hmm, heh.**

* * *

><p>"It's okay, just let it out."<p>

A deep exhale sounded through the mostly quiet house, followed by a series of hiccups and whines. Ludwig cocked an eyebrow as he silently shut the door and made his way into the living room. Elizaveta was currently weeping on their couch while Gilbert sat beside her, an arm around her shoulders to keep her from folding in on herself. She covered her own face to muffle her sobs.

Ludwig thought he hadn't seen Gilbert that concerned in years.

The blond tiptoed back behind the wall, trying to listen without being seen.

"I just...I don't understand!" she wibbled and sniffed.

"I told you he was a douchebag."

"But you don't, you don't understand! He said he loved me! We were /engaged/, for the love of god!"

"Elizav-"

"How do you just stop loving someone? What, one day you find them attractive and everything you're looking for and then the next day they're ugly as hell? Oh god, please don't tell me I'm hideous..."

"No, no. You're beautiful, Elizaveta. You're beautiful."

"Shut up asshole, I'm obviously not!"

"How do you know that's exactly why he left you? What if he just wasn't ready for marriage after all?"

"No, no... he left me for good. He... he got seriously pissed off and yelled at me one day. Said the engagement was off. Kicked me out. What do I do, I've got nowhere to go..."

Ludwig felt a little cruel for listening in on such a private conversation. He gripped the doorframe with white knuckles.

"Just... Move in with us. You can have my room. I'll sleep down here on the couch."

"No, Gil, I can't just... I can't live with you. Too soon, I just..."

Ludwig noticed the tiny flinch his brother gave and winced from behind the wall. He could tell Gilbert was crushed. He sucked in a breath and let it out silently, deciding to leave them alone to sort themselves out. He creaked up the stairs and tried his best to shut his bedroom door silently. 

Feliciano stared at the ceiling just in front of his face. Lying on his bed with his hands behind his head, he thought about what his brother had said. He knew Lovino was wrong, but something in the pit of his stomach tingled and said otherwise. He felt horrible. He wanted to be with Ludwig, he really did, more than anything; but for some reason he felt that he just couldn't disobey his brother like that. Something told him that _he _was the one who was wrong and Lovino had been right all along. He knew better than to believe that but the weird feeling plaguing him gave him second thoughts. Maybe he _should _break it off… After all, Lovino had always been the more logical one to an extent…

A knock at his door pulled him from his (somewhat) deep thinking. Lovino poked his head in the doorway, looking up at his loft bed.

"Hey," he said, nudging the door open further. "Um…"

Feliciano flipped onto his side to peer at Lovino through the bars of his bedframe. "What?"

"Look. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said those things. I'm just…" he paused, looking at the floor as if it would point him in the right direction. "I'm just trying to protect you is all. I worry about you, you know? You just don't think as often as you should and that leads me to believe I have to do the thinking for you."

"That's a little hurtful."

Lovino looks at him with squinted eyes. "You know what I mean."

"I get the point," Feliciano sighs and flips away from his brother.

The other shook his head, seeing that his apology hadn't quite worked. He turned to leave the room but a rustle in Feli's sheets made him pause.

"…I'll do it," Feliciano murmured.

Lovino smiled silently, not quite out of happiness but not out of fulfillment either. 

The next morning came around and Feliciano was nowhere to be found in the student center. Ludwig peered over the varying heads of the crowd and even asked Timo about it, who simply shrugged and suggested that perhaps he was sick. Ludwig nodded and continued on to gym class without a second thought.

It was strange though, because surely Feli would've called or texted him if that were the case, Ludwig thought as he jogged around the upper deck of the gymnasium. Of course the one day Mr. Karpusi didn't fall asleep was the day Ludwig had no one to talk to for the entire period. Alfred seemed to think Ludwig wanted to race him, since every time the boy passed him he gave the German some kind of death stare. It didn't really bother him until Alfred had passed him about the third time and decided to turn around and run backwards so he could try and talk to him.

"Where's your boytoy?"

"Excuse me?" Ludwig nearly snapped.

"Your faggot friend. Where's he at? Did you bang him too hard or something?"

"What's your deal?" Ludwig asked. "How come you suddenly hate me? Because I'm gay? That's pretty immature, don't you think? It's not like I'm any different than I was a week ago, or a day ago, or an hour ago…"

"I get the point. Just stay away from me, got it? Both you and your little buddy just leave me alone."

"I was, but then you decided to jog backwards in front of me. …How can you even do that, anyway?"

"Oh, well it just so happens that—Uh, anyway, just leave me alone. Don't mess with Arthur either."

"He doesn't seem to mind me or Feliciano at all." Ludwig raised an eyebrow at Alfred, who seemed at a loss for a moment. The other just gritted his teeth and turned back around, weaving through the crowd of people as he dashed on and around the corner. 

At lunch, Ludwig was rather confused and surprised to see Feliciano sitting right next to Kiku at their ususal spot. Ludwig took a seat by them and frowned a little as Feliciano tried hard not to look at him and Kiku just stared at his lunch as usual.

"Uhh…Is something wrong?" he asked, picking at his cuticles nervously.

Feliciano swallowed and avoided eye contact as he shook his head. Kiku looked between the two of them and sighed, sensing the obvious tension.

"…If something's the matter, you can tell me. It's not against the rules or anything."

The Italian sucked in a breath and looked at him silently. Ludwig felt heartbroken as Feliciano looked like he was about to cry at any moment. Not a word was exchanged, and either was left feeling hurt for the remainder of the day. 

Once the last bell had rung, Ludwig was determined to find Feli before he left for home to ask him what was wrong. He finally spotted Feliciano over on the far side of the parking lot, talking happily with Kiku who was merely pretending to listen.

Ludwig walked over to them and stood behind Feliciano. The Italian did not notice his presence, though the Japanese did. The small Asian boy looked at Feliciano and back at Ludwig to drag the Italian's attention that way. He spun around with a smile that soon turned into a gaping stare of horror. It seemed as if his bright aura was shattered and replaced with something cold. His eyes widened and then he squinted, a pained look growing on his features.

"Feliciano, I've been looking for you." The German said softly and pulled the Italian into a hug. The smaller boy felt stiff and tense in his muscles like he didn't want to be touched. He whispered the blonde's name and pushed him away gently, like he wanted to be forceful but couldn't bring himself to be. Ludwig held onto him by his arms and stared, confused.

"What's wrong?"

"I…I can't…not anymore…" Feliciano stumbled on his words and shook his head sorrowfully. Kiku had disappeared somewhere.

"What?"

"Lovino…he…he said we…I can't be around you anymore." The Italian's eyes watered and he held his breath. Ludwig's arms dropped.

"W-why? What did I do?"

"Ve! No! It wasn't you! You didn't do anything wrong!" the smaller one shouted and held his own stomach. "I… Grandpa, and he… I just… It's my fault, somehow it is… I just know…"

"Shh, no, Feliciano. It's not your fault. Is it because he doesn't trust me? Please, don't leave me because of that. You know I'd never hurt you."

"It's not….it's not that…"

"Then what…?"

"Lovino, he…he's kind of…how do I…put this…" Feliciano looked at the ground and fiddled with the edge of his sweatshirt. "Fratello is kind of…he has trust problems. But it's not because you look mean or anything. Which you kind of do, but… Something devastating happened in our famiglia, something that involved a killing, and… Well, you look a lot like the man that committed the crime… And fratello told me that I can't see you anymore, because he thinks you are related to that man…"

And Ludwig wasn't sure how to respond.

"…at least, that's what he told me… A-and that would explain why he never liked you to begin with, ve…"

Ludwig's hearing had tapered out. Just a hollow buzzing resounded around his ear drums. His body went fuzzy and numb and cold, so cold, and he felt as if his chest was made of lead, like it was too heavy for him to breathe.

Why did this always happen?

Why was it that every time he got so close, or he finally got just what he wanted, it was taken away from him in an instant? Just snatched away cruelly by some other entity; locked away like a caged animal or a golden prize in a glass cabinet where he was only allowed to look…

"…Ludwig?"

Only allowed to look…

"Ludwig? Are you okay?"

Never allowed to touch…

"Oh no…Oh no, you hate me now don't you?"

Never allowed to hold …

"Oh please don't hate me! I never wanted something like this to happen! This is the last thing I wanted to happen! I…I want to be with you, for a really long time, and I'd never want to leave you."

Or to keep…

"But…I can't go against fratello. I just can't. I…it's scary to think about what he'd do if he knew I broke his rules or disrespected him…"

Ludwig's blood was boiling within his veins. His skin was crawling and twitching; little painful itches he couldn't ever scratch.

"And…and I don't know if I could live with myself if I knew you hated me…because I-"

"Stop."

Feliciano stopped abruptly. Tears had slipped down his face in secrecy and his hands had started shaking a while ago. Ludwig was watching the ground with wide, blue eyes; his eyebrows knitted together in thought. Feli noticed a drip of blood seeping through the space in between his ghostly white fingers, like Ludwig had clenched his fist so hard that his finger nails cut into his palm.

The German boy looked up, stared into the other's caramel eyes. Feliciano couldn't tell what he was thinking, and frankly, that was terrifying. Ludwig made a quick move and grabbed Feli's face with his hands, a mild stinging tickling his left palm. He roughly brought the other's mouth toward his in a brief and unsatisfying kiss, just enough to get a feel, and he let go. Feliciano looked at him with sad eyes and a tiny, tiny frown. A bit of Ludwig's blood had smeared on his tan cheek.

Ludwig pulled on the best poker face he could.

"I don't hate you. Nothing in this entire world could ever make me hate you. But you are weak, Feliciano. You bend to other's wishes because it makes them happy, even if it ends up hurting you. And that is what I hate. So you can go ahead and kiss your bastard of a brother's dirty feet all you want. But when you realize that you are your own person, and you can make decisions for yourself, then you can come find me. I'll still be waiting."

He turned and left without another word. Feliciano began shaking his head in disbelief.

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><p><strong>Please don't hurt me. T^T In other news, Hetalia World Series comes out tomorrow! SCORE. Definitely making my sister drag me to Best Buy as soon as I wake up. Cheers to no school tomorrow~<strong>


	16. Chapter 16

**It's one of those days where the parental units do nothing but clean. ALL DAY LONG. So basically, I'm forced to stay cooped up in my room until they're done, lest I somehow screw up their wonderful cleaning ritual. Normally I'd be like WHATEVAH OKKE but I've got a raging headache and my stomach is like, reciting a prophecy to me or something. Oh well. ;n;**

**So I guess I'll just watch a bunch of Pewdiepie's videos all day (he does horror game walkthroughs. Sort of.) and try to beat Skyward Sword for the second time. It's freaking hard. Stupid Hero Mode. T^T**

* * *

><p>Ludwig opened the front door, feeling numb. He slung his backpack onto the floor of the foyer and stood there; staring at the ground. The more he thought about it, the worse he felt. A horrible, hot feeling pulsed deep within his chest and spread, making his head feel light. His breaths were short and angry, his brow furrowing and his hands clenching.<p>

Why did this always happen? Why did everything have to be taken away from him like this?

It wasn't his fault he was even born. It wasn't fair that he was being punished for no good reason other than being hated by his (ex) boyfriend's brother.

...his ex.

That tore it.

As soon as the thought crossed his mind, Ludwig clenched his jaw and let out an angry growl. He took deep breaths to try and calm himself (his old therapist recommended it) but it did nothing to help him. He gripped the rail of the stairs as he stomped to his room, his blunt fingernails leaving a squealing trail as they dragged against the polished wood.

He somehow managed to close the door lightly, perhaps thinking the door would crack if he slammed it. His nostrils flared with angry breathing and he felt like he was on fire. He needed to find something. Something to squeeze… to choke, to rip, to tear. He needed a wall to punch. He needed to see his knuckles bleed and to see blood dabbed on the dents in the walls where proof of his brute strength was evident.

No. No, he didn't want to go there again.

He needed someone to talk to. Someone to listen.

He needed Gilbert.

He glanced at the alarm clock on his bedside table, which told him his brother wouldn't be home for another hour.

"Damn it…" Ludwig cursed and sat on his bed. "Fucking hell…"

His anger seemed to melt into something different entirely; something lukewarm and uncomfortable, making its way down the curves of his face and into his lap. He didn't want to cry. No one really does, but he hated it most. Ludwig dug the heels of his hands into his eyes as if it would stop the occasional tear from sliding down and around his palm. He didn't make a noise, even when the aching in his eyeballs nearly grew unbearable. His hands fell from his face and his vision was blurred for the longest time, never quite becoming clear again. He gripped the sides of his head and just stared at the floor until the sound of footsteps came into his hearing.

Gilbert paused at his brother's open door, peeking inside. Ludwig was sitting on the edge of his bed and holding his head in his hands.

"Something the matter?" Gilbert asked and moved closer. Ludwig didn't look at him.

"Boy problems?" he tried again.

"Feliciano broke up with me. Because I look like someone his brother hates. Or something to that extent. I don't remember…"

Gilbert sighed and closed his eyes.

"Is there something wrong with me?"

Gilbert leaned against the door frame, looking at his brother with droopy eyes. "No."

"Then why is this happening?" Ludwig mumbled and wiped at his nose with the collar of his shirt. He turned and looked at his brother, expecting an honest answer. Gilbert could only think of how Ludwig's bloodshot eyes nearly matched the red shade of his own.

"It isn't your fault. You did nothing wrong."

"Then why do I feel like this? Why do I feel so disgusting and broken? Why am I so scared, then?" His voice gradually grew louder in a pitiful sounding crescendo. Gilbert closed his eyes for a moment and tried to sound as calm as he could.

"Because you're too fucking soft, Ludwig. On the inside. You feel guilty and sorry for yourself because you had your heart broken, but you don't know how to deal with it."

Ludwig clenched his teeth together, gnashing and grinding invading his hearing. He swallowed thickly and looked away. "Then what am I supposed to do?"

"Just give him time. He'll come around."

And with that, Gilbert turned and left the room. Ludwig listened and felt his bubbling rage subside with every echo of his brother's footsteps. Maybe Gilbert was right. Maybe he really did have no reason to feel guilty. He didn't really do anything wrong, did he? Nothing but having a face.

The phone began to ring shrilly, rebounding off the walls like a bouncing ball.

"I'll get it," his brother hollered. Ludwig sighed and lay back on his bed. He noticed after a few minutes that Gilbert hadn't said a word since answering the phone. It wasn't long before he decided to get out of bed and trudge down the stairs to see what was going on.

Gilbert, standing in the kitchen with the phone slightly pulled away from his ear, looked white as a ghost as he listened. Ludwig stood at the island in the middle of the room, leaning over the counter with a concerned look on his face. The older boy turned and hung up the phone on the wall without saying a proper farewell to whoever called.

"Who was it?" Ludwig asked.

"Mutter," Gilbert answered dejectedly. "They want you to move back to Germany with them."

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><p><strong>Short chapter, I'M SO SORRY. Today sucks.<strong>


	17. HELLO hey sorry please read this

Haha, um, hello! owo

It's been really long. Like, a year or two I think? Jesus I'm sorry.

I just want to say that I'm thinking about picking this up again.

That being said... along with how dang long it's been... is anyone even still interested in this?

I think I'll finish it if anyone wants to see the end of it.

Thank you for your time!


	18. Ok!

Hi, thanks for all your responses. uwu

Something unfortunate recently popped up so I might be pushing this back a little further. Spring break starts next friday so I'll try to start writing then.

Thanks again everyone!


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